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You Know You're From Northern Maine When

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by barnettbill, May 16, 2004.

  1. barnettbill

    barnettbill

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    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2003
    Location:
    Abilene TX
    You Know You're From Northern Maine When...

    You design your Halloween costumes to fit over a snowsuit
    The mosquitoes have landing lights
    You have more miles on your snow-blower than your car
    You have 10 favorite recipes for venison
    True-value hardware on any Saturday is busier than the toy stores at Christmas
    You live in a house that has no front steps, yet the door is one yard above the ground
    You've taken your kids trick-or-treating in a blizzard
    Driving is better in the winter because the potholes get filled with snow
    You think everyone from the city has an accent
    You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie with only 8 buttons
    You owe more money on your snowmobile than your car
    The local paper covers national and international headlines on l/4 page, but requires 6 pages for sports
    At least twice a year, the kitchen doubles as a meat processing plant
    The most effective mosquito repellent is a shotgun
    Your snow-blower gets stuck on the roof
    You think the start of deer hunting season is a national holiday
    You head south to go to your cottage
    You frequently clean grease off your barbecue so the bears won't prowl on your deck
    You know which leaves make good toilet paper
    The mayor greets you on the street by your first name
    There is only one shopping plaza in town
    The major parish fundraiser isn't bingo - its sausage making
    You find -20f a little chilly
    The trunk of your car doubles as a deep freezer
    You attended a formal event in your best clothes, your finest jewelry and your snowmobile boots
    You can play road hockey on skates
    Shoveling the driveway constitutes a great upper body workout
    You know the 4 seasons: winter, still winter, almost winter, and construction.
    The municipality buys a zamboni before a bus
    You actually 'get' these jokes, and forward them to all your northern friends
     
  2. frefoo

    frefoo

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    Joined:
    Apr 4, 2004
    Location:
    Northen VA
    You left out....


    Your idea of a traffic jam is the car in front of you at a stop light.

    I miss the traffic in Maine.
     

  3. Slotback

    Slotback Glock 35 Millennium Member

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    Joined:
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    Location:
    Texas
    Never been to Maine. I suspect that all of the above is true.;P