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You Know you LOVE 1911s When...

Discussion in 'Band of Glockers' started by Alexii, Aug 10, 2005.

  1. Alexii

    Alexii Janeway Forever

    Likes Received:
    Nov 14, 2001
    Delta Quadrant
    Some of the funny stuff I collated from various sources. Enjoy!

    You know you love 1911s when...

    - You hear "45" you think of a gun and not a record.
    - 1911 was a good year even though you were not alive then.
    - You clean your pistol more carefully than you clean yourself.
    - "Magazines" are no longer just something you read.
    - John Moses Browning is your hero.
    - 25 yards isn't too far away anymore.
    - The term "cocked and locked" isn't scary to you.
    - Paying 25 cents to pull back your index finger seems
    perfectly reasonable.
    - A 22 caliber hole just looks sad.
    - Your thumbs have become really strong (from loading bullets - and
    who needs a bushing wrench anyway?)
    - You trade so many 1911's you get one of your own back!
    - When the words “beaver” and “tail” conjure up images of a
    1911 accessory part.
    - You use a special cloth on your 1911 and it isn't allowed
    to touch other guns.
    - When you unconsciously hit the thumb safety every time you grab
    an everyday object like a coffee cup or pencil.
    - Honey, lock the door! I'm cocked and locked and ready to rock!
    - Doc, my internals are starting to show signs of wear.
    - You drive a Hyundai so you can afford that Heinie.
    - You by-pass the men's magazine stand at your local book store,
    and head straight for the gun rag rack!
    - You Pause, Zoom, and Frame Advance your DVD movies during
    any scene with a 1911.
    - You cringe when even a prop-gun 1911 is dropped in a movie
    - You root for the character good or bad that's carrying the 1911
    - You still watch Magnum PI re-runs
    - You "draw" your cell phone and "speed reload" your car keys!
    - You consider yourself a "1911 missionary," trying to save
    the poor souls who don't yet own at least one 1911.
    - You're like old friends with a total stranger when you each
    ask to see a 1911 from behind the counter, while others
    are busy looking at the plastic, smaller caliber guns.
    - You own two copies of the same model 1911 and are considering
    a third so you can leave one stock, tweak the other a little,
    and have the third in case something happens to one of
    the other two!
    - You completely unload and reload all of your magazines
    every night before you go to bed, "just to make sure."
    - You giggle at every little sexual innuendo because it
    makes you think of guns, instead of the other way around.
    - You detail strip your pistol every day because it's "fun."
    - "Browning" seems like a perfectly reasonable name for a baby girl.
    - You fantasize about being able to afford the trip to Gunsite.
    And not for the training either, but just to meet Jeff Cooper.
    - You're at the grocery store and none of the melons you buy
    are to eat.
    - You're too sick to go to work, but convince yourself that
    you feel well enough to go to the range "just for a little while."
    - You stare at yourself in the mirror holding your pistol,
    just because it looks really cool.
    - You have a ballistics charts, magazine photos and a poster
    of John Moses Browning hanging in your garage instead of a
    Snap-On calender.
    - Brownell's is on your speed-dial.
    - You talk about Les Baer, Ed Brown and Bill Wilson like you
    know them, but you really don't even know what they look like.
    - You have a Brownell's catalog in the magazine rack in
    your bathroom... And one on the coffee table... And one
    on the nightstand... And one in the car.
    - You stop in at your local gunshop at least once a week under
    the guise of chatting with the employees, but really you
    just want to see if they have any new Kimber, Springfield
    or Dan Wesson catalogs.
    - You don't need to start a group buy to get the 40+
    discount on Metalforms.
    - You know you love 1911s' when you hear Sheryl Crow sing
    "Soak Up The Sun" where she sings "I'm going to put my
    45 on" and you're thinking of her wearing a 1911 instead
    of the rating of a sunscreen.
    - Your holster cost twice as much as your last pair of dress shoes.
    - You own more holsters than your wife has shoes.
    - You throw the words "John Moses Browning" into every
    conversation with a Utah resident, assuming they'll
    know who you're talking about.
    - You consider converting to Mormonism.
    - You make your grandma tell everyone that she was born
    in 1911, just so you can here somebody say the word
    "1911" at family gatherings.
    - On the 19th of every month at 11 o'clock, you have a
    moment of silence.
    - When a neighbour asks to borrow a hammer, you ask
    "Spur or commander?"
    - You want a bumpersticker that says "Friends don't let
    friends buy Glocks"
    - When paying for ammo is more important than eating
    - You take the day off in Rememberence of JMB's Birthday.
    - You feel good with a seven round magazine because
    you know you only need one round
    - When you buy your wife her own 1911 so she'll keep her
    little paws off your Colt Gov 80 IV, SA TRP, and Wilson CQB.
    - When you name them(like I'm the only one thats done that).
    - When they get their own shelf in the safe.
    - When you go to shoot a glock and your thumb can't find the safety.
    - When you were given your Dads 1911 he carried in WW II you
    refused to shoot it. Instead you only clean it. I was
    never in the military so I feel I have not earned the
    right to shoot it.
    - When your wife asks you "how come you don't look at
    me like that anymore?"
    - When your carry your H&K locked and cocked
    - When you see a soldier carrying a 1911 and you say
    to yourself "why don't he clean that thing?!"
    - When you see an old worn out 1911 in a pawnshop and you
    buy it because you feel sorry for the old gal.
    - You look at your dining room table and wish it were Cocobolo.
    - You ask the salesman if they make furniture in Cocobolo.
    - You actually have furniture in Cocobolo.
    - You see the grain weight on a 9mm Luger and think: "Where's the
    OTHER half of the bullet?"
    - You OWN other types of handguns, but do not discuss
    or display them.
    - You wish you were that guy that weighed 900 pounds and
    had to get a tow truck to take him to the hospital, so
    that your pant legs would be large enough to conceal
    a full-sized 1911 in an ankle holster.
    - You believe that "Kimberly" is two letters too long.
    - When you're admitted to the hospital you get a Get Well
    card from SA saying "Get Well Soon, Can't make it Without You".
  2. Black Tiger

    Black Tiger

    Likes Received:
    Mar 4, 2004
    Leesburg, FL
    I feel offended by that. ;f

  3. mikol


    Likes Received:
    Apr 15, 2004
    currently in saudi arabia (jeddah)
    +1 when you can't wait to have your next vacation. not because you missed your wife & children alot, but because you missed alot the time you are spending 100's of ammos in the range with your 1911's. ;f ;) ;)
  4. Mang Danny

    Mang Danny

    Likes Received:
    Jan 11, 2005
    You know you love 1911s when...
    A USGI 1911 is the shining star in your gunsafe. ;)
  5. mikey177

    mikey177 Remember

    Likes Received:
    Jan 28, 2003
    There's a line in the Barry Manilow song "The Old Songs" that goes:

    And if all those plans I've made
    Don't melt the lady's heart
    I'll put on the old 45s

    So help me, whenever I hear that part, I always think of the singer strapping on a pair of single stack 1911s :)
  6. Allegra


    Likes Received:
    Mar 16, 2003
    Pag punta mo sa gunshow , you ignore everything else

    Which is why, I stopped going to gunshows
  7. doctabako

    doctabako Gun Aficionado

    Likes Received:
    Aug 11, 2003
    ....anything else is just a compromise :)
  8. nrmcolt

    nrmcolt What?

    Likes Received:
    Sep 26, 2004
    Raccoon City
    Just read your PM;P, pls. keep us updated,thanks!