You know you are a CORPORATE GHETTO - if....

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by pupcuss27, Aug 13, 2007.

  1. pupcuss27

    pupcuss27 CLM

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    You know you are CORPORATE GHETTO if two or more of the following are true.

    (Reply Add your GHETTO FAULTS to the list) !!!

    1. You don't officially start working in the morning until you read your
    emails or go on my space.

    2. You have at least one drawer/cabinet that contains more food than
    office supplies.

    3. Not only do you know all the security guards, janitors and
    cafeteria workers, one of them has asked you out on a date.

    4. Your version of a conference call is when you call your friends on
    their cell phones, and plan what you are doing for the weekend.

    5. The only time your man/woman picks you up from work is on payday.

    6. Friends and family members call you at work to cuss you out
    because you didn't answer your phone quickly enough.

    7. You paint your nails/toenails pick your nose at your desk.

    8. When you are on a personal call you, laugh so loud your co-workers
    on the other side of the office come and ask you what's so funny.

    9. You have pictures on your wall with you and your friends at the
    Club or with beer in your hands.

    10. To beat the system, you have codes for personal calls that let's
    someone know to call you right back. (Let the phone ring two times
    and call me right back).

    11. You give your out-of-town friends your company's 1-800 numbers.

    12. Before calling in sick, you rehearse your sick voice and sick story
    several times out loud.

    13. Coworkers inquire how your mother, grandmother, father's surgery
    went that required you to be out for days and you don't even know what
    they're talking about.

    14. You use the company's postage machine to stamp your personal mail.

    15. Your kid's school supplies all have your company insignia on
    them; you order personal supplies for you and your kids.

    16. You call in sick on payday Friday and send your cousin to pick up
    your paycheck. (Now THAT'S REAL ghetto!! Get direct deposit!!)

    17. You contribute $1 to the office Christmas party, eat the most
    food and take a platter of lunchmeat and potato salad home to your
    family for dinner.

    18. Before someone uses your telephone at your desk, they have to
    wipe the makeup off the handset.

    19. You call in sick on Monday because you went out on Sunday.

    20. You don't like your supervisor and a couple other coworkers and
    you tell them off on a regular basis and wonder why you haven't been
    promoted.

    21. You went shopping or to get your hair done on lunch and come back
    late and then ask "Was anybody looking for me?

    22. You cuss your creditors out for calling you at work.

    23. You come to work on Friday's dressed for the Happy Hour.

    24. Your kids call your job and say to the operator, "Let me speak to
    my Mama.

    25. You are sitting there reading this instead of getting your work
    done.
     
  2. DriBak

    DriBak GUNS UP Millennium Member

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    26. You have had sex on office time and on office property
    27. You have seen your bosses underwear
    28. You have gotten drunk with your boss, and their boss