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Why did the chicken cross the road?

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Gunrnr, Sep 24, 2002.

  1. Gunrnr

    Gunrnr Senior Goofoff Millennium Member

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    Why did the chicken cross the road?


    GEORGE W. BUSH
    I don’t think I should have to answer that question.


    AL GORE
    I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.


    RALPH NADER
    The chicken’s habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.


    PAT BUCHANAN
    To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.


    JERRY FALWELL
    Because the chicken was gay! Isn’t it obvious? Can’t you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side". "That’s what ‘they' call it—the “other side.” Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like “the other side.”


    DR. SEUSS
    Did the chicken cross the road?

    Did he cross it with a toad?

    Yes, The chicken crossed the road,

    But why it crossed, I’ve not been told!


    ERNEST HEMINGWAY
    To die. In the rain. Alone.


    MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
    I envision a world where alllllll chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.


    GRANDPA
    In my day, we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed The road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.


    BARBARA WALTERS
    Isn’t that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it overcame a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.


    JOHN LENNON
    Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.


    ARISTOTLE
    It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.


    KARL MARX
    It was a historical inevitability.


    SADDAM HUSSEIN
    This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.


    VOLTAIRE
    I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the
    death its right to do it.


    RONALD REAGAN
    What chicken?


    CAPTAIN KIRK
    To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.


    FREUD
    The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.


    BILL GATES
    I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads,but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook -- and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken V1.23 .


    EINSTEIN
    Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?


    BILL CLINTON
    I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken please?


    LOUIS FARRAKHAN
    The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed
    the “black man” in order to trample him and keep him down.


    THE BIBLE
    And God came down from the heavens, and He said Unto the chicken,”Thou
    shalt cross the road” And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.


    COLONEL SANDERS
    I missed one?
     
  2. Egyas

    Egyas Troll Hater

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    Oh yea, too good!
     

  3. caddyshack

    caddyshack AmbulanceDriver

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    just had to forward that one!!

    ;i ;i ;i


    ;+ ;+ ;+
     
  4. mhambi

    mhambi κολασμένος

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    That's funny.






    ps. nice avatar:cool:
     
  5. MrMurphy

    MrMurphy ********* Moderator Lifetime Member Millennium Member

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    Oldie but goodie.
     
  6. heyTJ

    heyTJ Giddy up!

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    Very good! I like the Pat Buchanan one the best.
     
  7. matt3310

    matt3310 who me???

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    ;f ;f ;f ;f ;f ;f ;f ;f ;c ;f ;c ;f ;c ;f ;c ;c ;c ;c
     
  8. BobRicks

    BobRicks

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    You forgot the "Texan's Answer", to prove to the armadillo that it could be done.;f
     
  9. igrp

    igrp ut supra

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