What's the dumbest thing you've ever been asked?

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by Smashy, Feb 19, 2010.

  1. Smashy

    Smashy

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    Years ago, I was telling my brother's girlfriend (Diane) the story about how I was stung by a scorpion when I was a little kid, which became more interesting to her when I told her that I also happen to be a Scorpio. It seemed to give the story that extra touch of astrological 'wowness'.

    Diane was riveted, taking in every word I said with unswerving attention. "We had just come back from the lake," I was telling her, "and my mom pulled out some towels from one of the bags and put them on the bed. I was on the bed next to the towels."

    "Unnoticed by me or my mom," I continued, "a scorpion crawled out from one of the towels right next to me" (her eyes were getting pretty wide at this point in the story), "and as I leaned over, I put my hand on it and it stung me on the palm." Diane looked at me with complete seriousness and asked, "Did you die?"
     
  2. Brian Lee

    Brian Lee Drop those nuts

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    Up a tree.

  3. rfenster

    rfenster CLM

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    Duh, look at his avatar....
     
  4. ju993rnaut

    ju993rnaut

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    I was at my friends house and I forget how exactly we go on this subject but one of my friends asked " what was Hitlers last name??" the group loled and said friend felt like a dummy.
     
  5. Spen84107

    Spen84107

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    I promise this really happen.

    A girl I used to work with, came up to me and in a very quiet voice, asked me, "Hey, Spence... can I ask you a question?" "Yeah. Sure." "So, i was outside, and Dave told me that he thinks the problem with my car is the hydraulic fluid for the turn-signal system, or something like that. I told him I was surprised I didn't think of that, and thanked him. But I'm not really sure what that means.. will you help me?":shocked:

    I seriously thought that was a well known joke. Didn't know people actually fell for it.
     
  6. Spen84107

    Spen84107

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    :rofl::rofl:

    This reminds me. Years ago, my ex-girlfriend's best friend, was telling us this wild story that none of us believed. She exclaimed very angrily, "I'm serious! I saw it on 60/60!" :shocked:
     
  7. ju993rnaut

    ju993rnaut

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    :rofl: I got one more for you.

    Im hispanic and I took my folks out to eat one day. We decided we would try this new BB-Q restaraunt. They were running a special, the que for two, and sure enough my dad orders the que for two for himself and my mom but pronounces it in spanish.
     
  8. bennwj

    bennwj Command Sergeant Major (retired) Silver Member

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    A week or so after I got married, I did a 20 or 25 mile road march back from the field. My bride picked me up at the Company and I walked (with obvious discomfort) to the car. When I got in she said, "Do your feet hurt?" My response just about landed me in divorce court, but 17 years later she is still around.......
     
  9. Spen84107

    Spen84107

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    hahah No intention of being a one-upper, or anything like that--but that actually reminded me of another story, regarding the same people. The guy, David, who is the one from the original story that told the girl (Michelle) about the blinker fluid, was hispanic. We were all outside the building one afternoon, and he says, "I have a great joke for you guys." It's a slightly inappropriate joke, so I'll leave that part out, but it was a joke about hispanics. Michelle, very confused, looks at David and says, "But, I thought you were hispanic, why are you telling a joke like that?" :)shocked:). He looks at her, slightly confused, yet not confused at all because of who it came from, and responds, "Oh, yeah, but it's OK. Im taking pills to fix that." :rofl: She just said, "Oh...." and left it at that. :faint::rofl:
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2010
  10. goldenlight

    goldenlight

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    "Is that gun loaded?"
     
  11. JLB768

    JLB768 Old & Grumpy Lifetime Member

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    Why I bought an Italian sports car, and didn't buy American :dunno:
     
  12. Rashid.4v

    Rashid.4v

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    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Brian Lee
    Well did you?

    I was sleepy until I read thru this. :rofl:
     
  13. NavDoc

    NavDoc Guest

    "Did that hurt?" is always a good one after hurting yourself.
     
  14. rfenster

    rfenster CLM

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    My father-in-law asked me "When is Cinco De Mayo?"
     
  15. The_Drizzle

    The_Drizzle I make it rain!

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    Working security a while back and the other guard that was on duty (blonde female) calls out on the radio:

    Female: I think I hear an alarm. What should I do?

    Me: Where is it?

    Female: In this room.

    Me: What room? What is it for? What equipment is it on?

    Female: I don't know, it is dark in there. What should I do?

    Me: Turn the lights on.

    Female: How?

    Me: The light switch.

    Female: Where is that?

    Me: By the door I am guessing.

    Female: O nevermind.

    When she got back to the office she told me I better go take a look and see if I could find anything wrong. I went through the whole building and found no alarms or anything wrong. I have no idea what she heard.
     
  16. raven11

    raven11

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    Your in the Air Force! Do you fly planes?
    If you join the Air Force does that mean you can fly on any airline for free?

    And that's the tip of the iceberg
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2010
  17. jp3975

    jp3975

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    Ive got the best one.

    "Can you get pregnant by swallowing"

    Granted the girl was 15...but seriously?

    [thought id better edit this so as not to catch any heat. I was 16 at the time and it wasnt in reference to me]
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2010
  18. Daynja

    Daynja

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    "How many dimes for a dollar?"

    Another time someone asked if I could run something on their computer remotely. They couldn't because the building had lost power.
     
  19. Bluecard

    Bluecard GUNDWG

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    While working a Felony Warrant Unit one of our administrative assistants looked at my gun in the holster one day and said, do all officers carry their guns with bullets in them? When I said, "Um, well yes." She asked "why? Isn't that dangerous?" I just smiled and walked away.
     
  20. OXCOPS

    OXCOPS

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    "You aren't really gonna take me to jail, are you?"