What if all dead people came back as zombies...

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by Huaco Kid, Sep 13, 2015.

  1. Huaco Kid

    Huaco Kid

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    But they had no desire to eat brains?

    They just wander around like pigeons in the city or swarms of Canadian geese in the business parks? Maybe they'd just want to eat carrots. Or Butterfingers, or Fiddle-Faddle, or something.

    They would be dirty and nasty and decayed; rancid walking meat-beings. How would we keep them out of traffic? Would we fence-off a midwest state and just put them in there? Would we be allowed to just shoot them on sight? Kids could tie them to bicycles, with a Butterfinger on a stick?

    Would someone create a Dead Lives Matter movement? Or would we be allowed to tie them to farm implements, or treadmills for electrical generation? Could they vote? --> One large red button and one large blue button. Would families have to keep their own, tied up like a dog? Can we tie bombs on them and send them into battle?

    A TV show about them would be about as exciting as the new FTWD show; just different scenarios, problems and solutions.

    I'll bet the vote-thing would be inevitable. And a whole system of Dead Welfare workers to fine us and enforce Dead-Credit taxes.
     
  2. r3dot

    r3dot

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  3. Paul53

    Paul53 You local friendly Skynet dealer

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    Isn't that what were hoping for?
     
  4. hogfish

    hogfish Señor Member

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    Of course.
     
  5. Brian Lee

    Brian Lee Drop those nuts

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    On my lawyers advice, from now on my bakery will offer wedding cakes featuring the buyers choice of little plastic models of either the brain-eating, or the non brain-eating type of zombie couples on top of them.

    We do any combination of human/zombie, sex or brain-eating preference. Marry a zombie quick get 25 percent off the regular price, this week only.
     
  6. Pope-onna-Rope

    Pope-onna-Rope

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    Lol, OK, I would sit my zombie down, and calmly explain that yes, you ARE dead, and as such, have NO rights.
    So you ( the zombie) need to quietly slip back into yer coffin, ah, ah, ah... no arguing, go back into your forever state of decay, and leave the living to the ALIVE.
    Face it, Abercrombie, you have no vocal chords, no lungs, no brain, uh, nothing except the death-stench, and yes, you friggin' STINK, not to mention the flies and maggots.
    And turn off that Alice Cooper song, ' I love the Dead' , willya?
    I have no desire to spend eternity in the dark, dank, worm-infested conscious dead zone....so maybe when we figure out how to keep people dead, we will dig you up, make sure you are dead forever, and all will be well again. 'Til then, off you go, no debate, go on...now git. Don't make me stop this hearse.

    I had to quit the Walking Dead T.V. show because of the many, many, many logic problems involved, least of which is the FACT that the entire world would have a stench to choke an elephant. What about the rest of the planet? what about chimps ? what about polar bears ? lice ? amoebas ? French people, " le Brains ! ",
    Add to the nasty habit the survivors have of keeping zombie blood all over themselves with seemingly no desire to wipe themselves off, day after day of wandering about with pieces of decaying zombie flesh on their arses, just couldn't watch any more.
    " 'scuse me, you have a bit of friggin' ZOMBIE meat on yer face, lemme get that for ya..."
    :cool:
     
  7. ChuteTheMall

    ChuteTheMall Wallbuilder and Weapon Bearer

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    They already voted.


    .
     
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  8. DWARREN123

    DWARREN123 Grumpy Old Guy

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    I thought the dems/libs were already Z- People!
    Don't they already vote?
     
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  9. NMG26

    NMG26

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    I see zombies all the time.

    Of course I get up at 4 am and ride my bicycle to work through a zombie rich neighborhood in Albuquerque.

    Mostly harmless, but they do talk to themselves while walking down the middle of Central Ave.

    They mostly survive.

    .
     
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  10. ddbtoth

    ddbtoth

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    Sounds like Detroit.
     
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  11. wingryder

    wingryder

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    #ZombieLivesMatter
     
  12. Huaco Kid

    Huaco Kid

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    No.

    These aren't trainable zombies (Zombi), not like dogs, just like a pack of pigeons.

    (A group, a pack, a herd, a gaggle, a swarm...)

    Of pigeons.

    A Smell of zombies.

    They can't be trained, not even mailmen,

    Or, "Coo coo coo"

    Or, "GGgggaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah""

    Or, what the zombie crabs say......................

    nothing.

    They can't talk.

    So... (exempitified, I believe, as Nancy has posted)

    All them zombies would just be going all over the interstate, getting crashed, and going, goo goo.

    Not like the cats have found home-grown catnip.

    I have to go.
     
  13. Huaco Kid

    Huaco Kid

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    They don't even know they're zombies.

    They walk around like everybody else.
     
  14. Huaco Kid

    Huaco Kid

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    Little Black Box!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


    Zombie!!!!!!
     
  15. Huaco Kid

    Huaco Kid

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    bangbangbangbnagnbangnbangbandnbang,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

    empty...............

    and,,,, a machete, with a red handle.............................
     
    Last edited: Sep 14, 2015
  16. Huaco Kid

    Huaco Kid

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    "I bet they're gonna feel pretty hugg'in stupid."

    When they realize they're messin' with the wrong huggin' people."
     
  17. Huaco Kid

    Huaco Kid

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    All I need is two Alka Seltzers and, like, ten Almond Joys.

    And that's all I need.

    And this chair.....
     
  18. NMG26

    NMG26

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    The ones that scare me the most are the ones that drive cars! HS, there is a bunch of them.
     
  19. Tvov

    Tvov

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  20. MikeG22

    MikeG22 CLM

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    Doesn't work. Without them eating other people en masse then it wouldn't spread to such unmanageable levels. You'd have a bunch of fat old people who had heart attacks and at the time they called death they could just do whatever was needed to make it permanent. Or just fence em up in the desert till they dry up. That's what gets me with Walking Dead and the like, two weeks without water with open wounds and the muscles would dry up and be fully unusable. Brain would dry out and self kill itself too.