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Walmart Winery

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by PatrolMom, Jun 4, 2002.

  1. PatrolMom

    PatrolMom

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    BENTONVILLE, ARK (AP) - Some Wal-Mart customers soon will be able to sample a new discount item -- Wal-Mart's own brand of wine. The world's largest retail chain is teaming up with E&J Gallo Winery of Modesto, Calif., to produce the spirits at an affordable price, in the $6-8 range.

    "While wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to throw a bottle of Wal-Mart brand wine into their shopping carts, there is a market for inexpensive wine," said Kathy Micken, professor of marketing at Roger Williams University in Bristol, Rhode Island. She said, "The right name is very important."

    So, with that in mind, here are the top 12 suggested names for Wal-Mart Wine:

    ** Chateau Traileur Doublewide
    ** White Trashfindel
    ** Big Red Gulp
    ** Grape Expectations
    ** Domaine Wal-Mart "Merde du Pays"
    ** NASCARbernet
    ** Chef Boyardeaux
    ** Peanut Noir
    ** Chateau des Moines
    ** I Can't Believe It's Not Vinegar!
    ** World Championship Wriesling

    And the number 1 name for Wal-Mart Wine...
    ** Nasti Spumante
     
  2. ubimow

    ubimow

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    OMG! That's too funny! I agreee with the #1 name for their wine!;g
     

  3. 1loneranger

    1loneranger

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  4. okie

    okie GT Mayor

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    PMOM you are just to dang funny;f ;f ;f ;c ;a
     
  5. master tigon

    master tigon to deep for you

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    I thought of some more wonderful wines

    Sparkling choice de sam's
    White trashindel
    Red Neckenberry zinfindel
    Sparkling Applepiss
    Chatuae de Walton
    White JeffGordonberry

    feel free to add more. sprry this would be better don't know that much about wines.

    What next walmart brand condom? Although that probably would solve a few imbreeding problems;b
     
  6. DScottHewitt

    DScottHewitt EMT-B

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    Most of the wine we have NOW is less than eight dollars....

    Scott

    (I get the Sutter Home White Zinfandel, in the little bitty single serving bottles. Four cost like $4.97...)

    Scott

    ;b
     
  7. wrenrj1

    wrenrj1

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    What's this bottle crap? how much for a box?

    Wren
     
  8. Atillix

    Atillix Reformed Troll

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    Who the hell in there right mind would buy WINE form WALMART? Enless of course your already buying redwood stain for your deck, Polyester curtains, a Nascar tshirt with Jeff Gordon proudly embazened across the front, and at least one pair of Jordach jeans. Not knockin' Wally world but where my inlaws live in PA, there's a Walmart that has a grocery store built in and is open 24/7. It's just funnier than hell to go there and just people watch. It beats going to the zoo. Some of the stuff you see there is kinda cute,some of it is big and smelly and somestuff is just downright strange. And last but not least you have those certain specimens that make you ask yourself" Did God intend for that to look/act/sound/behave like that?"
     
  9. YosemiteSam357

    YosemiteSam357 Revolver Zen

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    Polyester curtains? Heck no! Just pin a couple of old dish towels together. Get with the program. ;)

    -- Sam
     
  10. Atillix

    Atillix Reformed Troll

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    Dish towels, that's new. Around here some folks just use old bed sheets. I reckon them folks aint got no dish towels purdy nuff fer them there winder treatments.;g
     
  11. Bildungsroman

    Bildungsroman Madberater

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    It will be cheaper by the drum (50 gallon drum)
     
  12. YosemiteSam357

    YosemiteSam357 Revolver Zen

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    Better yet, the ol' Walmart Keg 'o Chablis!

    -- Sam
     
  13. vegalife

    vegalife

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    I can't believe its not -insert your favorite wine name here-

    Imitation wines (like imitation fragrances), for example,
    Imitation Kendal Jackson merlot, etc.