This guy I work with (Chester, 70 yrs old) is a real character. He grew up in Texas and played football at Ole Miss WAAAY back in the day.. anyway, I digress. There's always something that happens at work that reminds him of some story, so one night, he breaks into this one (sounds better if you can imagine a slow, baritone, texas drawl here... "Yeah, so.. one day when I's a boy, my paw gets a call from the lady next door..." [which would be the next farm over, 3 miles away/next door type] "...says she wants to mate her cow with our bull. So we walk this bull down to her place and my paw says, 'Chet.. now you stay out here and keep an eye on them. I'm gonna go inside here and drink a lemonade. Now when that bull leaps her, you come get me.' So .. after about 2 hours or so, my paw finally comes out and says, 'Chet.. that bull leap that cow yet?' I said, 'Leap'er? Hell! He'd-a jumped clean over her if he didn't have his d*** in her a**!'" true story..