Three men are bragging about their sex lives. The Italian says, "Last week, my wife and I had great sex. I rubbed her body all over with olive oil, we made passionate love, and she screamed for 5 minutes at the end." The Frenchman boasts, "That's nothing! Last week when my wife and I had sex, I rubbed her body all over with warm creamery butter. Then we made passionate love and she screamed for 15 minutes." The Irishman says, "Well, last week my wife and I had sex too. I rubbed her body all over with goose grease. Then we made mad passionate love -- and she screamed for one solid hour! The Italian and Frenchman were stunned. They replied, "What could you have possibly done to make your wife scream for one solid hour?" The Irishman smiled, "I wiped my hands on her lace curtains."