In a tiny village lived an old maid. In spite of her old age, she was still a virgin. She was very proud of it. She knew her last days were getting closer so she told the local undertaker that she wanted the following inscription on her tombstone: "Born as a virgin, lived as a virgin, died as a virgin" Not long after the old maid died peacefully and the undertaker told his men what the lady had said. The men went to carve it in but being the lazy no-goods they were, they thought the inscription to be unnecessarily long. So they simply wrote: "Returned unopened".