The Wal-Mart Greeter An obnoxiously loud, VERY unattractive, snarling woman walks into Wal-Mart with her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through the entrance. The Wal-Mart Greeter (a seasoned elderly gentleman, grey of hair and with still a little sparkle in his eyes) says, "Good morning and welcome to Wal-Mart .... Nice children you've got there - are they twins?" The ugly woman stops screaming long enough to say, "Hell no they ain't twins. The oldest one, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins?........ Are you blind or just stupid? Do you really think they look alike?!" "No", replies the greeter. "I just couldn't believe you got laid twice."