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The Do's & Don't's of Women

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by okie, Jul 11, 2003.

  1. okie

    okie GT Mayor

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    If you kiss her, you are not a gentleman
    If you don't, you are not a man

    If you praise her, she thinks you are lying
    If you don't, you are good for nothing

    If you agree to all her likes, you are a wimp
    If you don't, you are not understanding

    If you visit her often, she thinks it is boring
    If you don't, she accuses you of double-crossing

    If you are well dressed, she says you are a playboy
    If you don't, you are a dull boy

    If you are jealous, she says it's bad
    If you aren't, she thinks you do not love her

    If you attempt a romance, she says you didn't respect her
    If you don't, she thinks you do not like her

    If you are a minute late, she complains it's hard to wait
    If she is late, she says that's a girl's way

    If you visit another man, you're not putting in "quality time"
    If she is visited by another woman, "oh it's natural, we are girls"

    If you kiss her once in a while, she professes you are cold
    If you kiss her often, she yells that you are taking advantage

    If you stare at another woman, she accuses you of flirting
    If she is stared by other men, she says that they are just admiring

    If you talk, she wants you to listen
    If you listen, she wants you to talk
     
  2. David_G17

    David_G17 /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/

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    ~sigh~ we never can win.
     

  3. scooterbear

    scooterbear

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    sounds like who I use to date!!!!

    ;f
     
  4. BrassInPocket

    BrassInPocket

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    Sure you can. Just NEVER tell us we have a big butt. ;)
     
  5. Slotback

    Slotback Glock 35 Millennium Member

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    Obviously you have met my wife.
     
  6. Ronny

    Ronny Good Guy

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    HAHAHAHAHA

    Oh man. That reminds me of somthing I did when I had a job stocking shelves after school when I was in high school. A girl I was friendly with asked me if I thought she was gaining weight. Not thinking I said "Well you are getting a plump around the middle," as I poked her in the belly. I thought it was totally innocent as I did it. Little did I know how she would react, she got angry. She yelled at me for calling her fat and then she went around the store telling everyone who would listen that I insulted he and called her fat. I had to explain to about 6 other people including the manager that I didn't and was just playing. It wasen't fair that she reacted like that, I didn't know I shouldn't have done that. At least I learned my lesson and will just change the subject if a question like that arises. ;g