The Byte Before Christmas

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Blitzer, Dec 12, 2005.

  1. Blitzer

    Blitzer Cool Cat

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    The Byte Before Christmas

    'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house,
    Not a user was using ... not even a mouse;
    The programs were hung from the bugs in their code,
    In hopes that a guru would soon cure their woes;

    The data were nestled all snug in their beds,
    While versions of software danced in their heads;
    The boss dimmed the lights as I locked up my desk,
    A couple days off and a well-deserved rest;

    Then all of a sudden there came such a clatter,
    I sprang from my chair to see what was the matter.

    Away to the processor I flew like a flash,
    What a terrible sound .. like a massive headcrash;
    The lights they were blinking and beaming aglow,
    The hardcopy printout said "Let service know!";

    When what to my wandering eyes should appear,
    On a silicon wafer ... a field engineer;
    A little device driver, so lively and quick,
    I knew in a moment it must be St. Chip!

    More rapid than Macro, his cursor insane,
    He whistled and shouted like a video game.

    Now, Pascal! Now, Basic!, Now, Fortran and Cobol!
    On RPG! On PL/1, On Dibol and Snobol!
    To the top of the registers, the bottom of core!
    Run diagnostics and see what they store!

    As memory leaves when electricity flies,
    The 'Rep' cracked a smile and loosened his tie;
    He was chubby and plump, said the place was a wreck,
    And I laughed when I saw him (in spite of high tech).

    A wink of his eye, and a twist of his head,
    Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread.
    He was dressed from his head to his feet in a suit,
    His briefcase was heavy with tools to re-boot.

    With bundles of bits bulging out of his slacks,
    He looked like a pro 'bout to fix a blown pack.
    He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
    Reseated PC boards, then turned with a smirk;

    Hit return with his finger and said "Here it goes,"
    And giving a nod, into the CRT he dove.
    But I heard him exclaim, 'ere leaving the site,
    "Restore the data, and all will be right!"