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Texan baby

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by nipperwolf, Jun 1, 2003.

  1. nipperwolf

    nipperwolf

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    >
    > > >>>>A Texan is drinking in a New York bar when he gets a call on his cell phone. He hangs up, grinning from ear to ear, and orders a round of drinks for everybody in the bar because, he announces, his wife has just produced a typical Texas baby boy weighing 25 pounds. Nobody can believe that any new baby can weigh in at 25 pounds, but the Texan just shrugs, "That's about average down home, folks...like I said, my boy's a typical Texas baby boy."
    > Congratulations showered him from all around, and many exclamations of "WOW" were heard. One woman actually fainted due to sympathy pains.
    >
    > Two weeks later he returns to the bar. The bartender says, "Say, you're the father of that typical Texas baby that weighed 25 pounds at birth, aren't you? Everybody's been making' bets about how big he'd be in two weeks.
    We were gonna call you; so how much does he weigh now?" The proud father answers, "Seventeen pounds."
    > The bartender is puzzled, and concerned. "What happened? He already
    weighed 25 pounds the day he was born."
    > The Texas father takes a slow swig from his long neck Lone Star beer,wipes his lips on his shirt sleeve, leans into the bartender and proudly says,



    > "Had him circumcised".
    >
    > >
     
  2. vafish

    vafish

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    Oh come one,

    The truth is that all you have to do to get a texas baby to go from 25 lbs to 17 lbs is wait for him to fill his diaper, then empty it.


    Question:

    How do you bury a 6 foot tall 200 pound Texan in a shoe box?

    Answer:

    Give him an enema first. (or kick the S--- out of him)
     

  3. lomfs24

    lomfs24

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    There was an old Texan rancher and a local Montana rancher discussing things on the ranch. The Texan was bragging a little.

    He said "It takes me all day to drive across my ranch!"
    The old Montanan replied, "Yeah, I used to have a pickup like that but I sold it."