A Texan arrives at a New York Hotel, checks in and tells the desk clerk to send up a bottle of good whiskey and a woman to his room. In a short while, someone knocks on his door. When he opens it, there stands an attractive lady in a Salvation Army uniform. He looks surprised but invites her in. She says, "You asked for a lady, didn't you?" He says, "Well, Yes," so she begins to disrobe. When she is almost undressed, she stops suddenly and says, "By the way, are you married or single?" He says, "I'm married" so she starts to put all her clothes back on. "What the Hell?", the Texan asks. Her reply, "We're strictly for the needy, not the greedy".