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Songs for the Underdog

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Blitzer, Jan 19, 2010.

  1. Blitzer

    Blitzer Cool Cat

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    The communist's play ground of OHIO
    I'm tied of being a little fart, I'm gonna be a big **** some day!

    Honey I may be on the bottom now but I'll be on top some day!

    She Got The Ring And I Got The Finger

    Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth ‘Cause I’m Kissing You Goodbye

    If I Can’t Be Number One In Your Life,

    Then Number Two On You

    If I Had Shot You When I Wanted To, I’d Be Out By Now

    You’re the Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly

    Can’t Get Over You, So Why Don’t You Get Under Me?

    All My Exes Live in Texas

    I Thought She Was Out Jogging,

    But She Was Running Around On Me

    If the Phone Don’t Ring, It’s Me Not Calling You Up

    All the Guys Who Turn Me On Turn Me Down

    If Love were Oil, I’d be a Quart Low

    Her Teeth were Stained, but her Heart was Pure

    At the Gas Station of Love, I Got the Self-Service Pump

    How Come Your Dog Don’t Bite Nobody But Me?

    I Wish I Were a Woman (So I Could Go Out With a Guy Like Me)

    It Don’t Feel Like Sinnin’ To Me

    I’m Gettin’ Gray From Being Blue

    If You Can’t Live Without Me, Why Aren’t You Dead Yet?

    I Sat Down On a Beartrap (Just This Morning)

    Mama Get The Hammer (There’s A Fly On Papa’s Head)

    Heaven’s Just A Sin Away

    She Made Toothpicks Out Of The Timber Of My Heart

    Guess My Eyes Were Bigger Than My Heart

    If Fingerprints Showed Up On Skin,

    Wonder Whose I’d Find On You

    I Keep Forgettin’ I Forgot About You

    Liked You Better Before I Knew You So Well

    Gave Her My Heart And a Diamond,

    And She Clubbed Me With a Spade

    I Don’t Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling

    Going to Hell in Your Heavenly Arms

    There Ain’t Enough Room in my Fruit of the Looms,

    to Hold All My Lovin’ for You

    It’s Hard to Kiss the Lips at Night,

    that Chew Your *** Out All Day Long

    If Whiskey Were A Woman I’d Be Married For Sure

    It Ain’t Love But It Ain’t Bad

    I Still Miss You Baby, But My Aim’s Gettin’ Better

    C’mon Down off the Stove, Granny,


    You’re Too Old to Ride the Range

    Don’t Cry On My Shoulders Cause Your Rustin’ My Spurs

    Don’t Run Through The Screen Door Honey,

    you’ll Only Strain Yourself

    Forget the Night, Help Me Make It Through the Door

    From The Indies To The Andes In His Undies

    I Can’t Love Your Body if Your Heart’s Not In It

    If Money Talks, It Ain’t On Speaking Terms With Me

    If My Nose Were Full of Nickels, I’d Blow It All On You

    If You Leave Me, Can I Come Too?

    I Just Couldn’t Leave Her Behind Alone

    I Just Fell In Something and I Sure Hope It’s Love

    I’m Just A Bug On The Windshield of Life

    I’m So Miserable Without You, It’s Like Having You Here

    I’m Sorry I Made You Cry, But At Least Your Face Is Cleaner

    I Only Have Eyes For You, but Look What I’ve Got For Your Sister

    My Sweet Tooth Says I Wanna, But My Wisdom Tooth Says No

    Now I lay Me Down To Cheat

    Peekin’ Through the Knothole In Grandma’s Wooden Leg

    Since You Bought The Waterbed We’ve Slowly Drifted Apart



    --
    "Good intentions will always be pleaded for every assumption of authority. It is hardly too strong to say that the Constitution was made to guard the people against the dangers of good intentions. There are men in all ages who mean to govern well, but they mean to govern. They promise to be good masters, but they mean to be masters." - Daniel Webster
     
  2. Dennis in MA

    Dennis in MA Get off my lawn

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    I got tears in my ears cryin in my bed over you.

    She got the goldmine, I got the shaft.

    Dropkick me Jesus through the goalposts of life.
     

  3. RioKid

    RioKid

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    That's some funny stuff there. Thanks.:rofl::rofl: