Some cold weather humor......

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by DR. HOUSE, Mar 16, 2010.

  1. DR. HOUSE

    DR. HOUSE Everybody Lies

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    Im sure this will make all my nebraska neighbors laugh.


    COLD IS A RELATIVE THING...

    65 above zero:
    Arizonans turn on the heat.
    People in Nebraska plant gardens.

    60 above zero:
    Californians shiver uncontrollably.
    People in Nebraska sunbathe.

    50 above zero:
    Italian & English cars won't start.
    People in Nebraska drive with the windows down.

    40 above zero:
    Georgians put on down coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
    People in Nebraska throw on a flannel shirt.

    35 above zero:
    New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
    People in Nebraska have the last cookout before it gets cold.

    20 above:
    People in Miami all die.
    Nebraskan close the windows.

    Zero:
    Californians fly away to Mexico .
    People in Nebraska get out their winter coats.

    10 below zero:
    Hollywood disintegrates.
    The Girl Scouts in Nebraska are selling cookies door to door.

    20 below zero:
    Washington DC runs out of hot air.
    People in Nebraska let the dogs sleep indoors.

    30 below zero:
    Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
    Nebraskans get upset because they can't start the Snowmobile.

    40 below zero :
    ALL atomic motion stops .
    People in Nebraska start saying... "Cold enough fer ya? "

    50 below zero:
    Hell freezes over.
    Nebraska public schools will open 2 hours late.
     
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2010
  2. mymini40

    mymini40

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  3. Zombie Steve

    Zombie Steve Decap Pin Killa

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    Sounds about right. I think I got 2 snow days in 13 years of primary education.
     
    Last edited: Mar 16, 2010
  4. tlafrance

    tlafrance Missing AZ

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    I'm SO not looking fwd to my first NE winter :crying: 22 yrs in the desert has thinned my blood. BTW, grew up in the NorthEast so I understand cold, just managed to avoid it for all these years.

    Tom
     
  5. Blinky

    Blinky Rocket Surgeon

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    Yeah, that's about right. My leather jacket has a liner that I can zip in and out. When it got to be a steady +/- 30 degrees, I pulled the liner out of the jacket. The winter hat went back in the closet too..
     
  6. DR. HOUSE

    DR. HOUSE Everybody Lies

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    It will be ok, dress warm prepare to go out like your going to get stranded.
    And use your ****ing head when driving on the snow and ice for ****ing sakes. Take her slowely.........
     
  7. farley45

    farley45

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    :rofl:

    That's pretty good man.

    Hell, when it hit 40s the other week and the sun was out I had my window down on the pickup:supergrin:.
     
  8. Blinky

    Blinky Rocket Surgeon

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    me too. :smoking: