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So, before I get too far along, I'd ask that only serious answers be posted...jokes are fine, but we (my family) are facing some hard decisions right now, and I could really use some advice...even if it's from people I don't know from anywhere other than on here.
Oh, and for the one guy who I know to be from around here...PLEASE keep quiet about what you might read. You have my trust, so don't screw me over on it....
Anyway on to it -
This actually has nothing to do with my career. Oddly enough, my usually ****ed up agency is OK to work for, with the typical nonsense that accompanies any type of LE job, of course.
The problem lies with the wife's department. I'll try and make it brief, but a number of circumstances have brought us to a point to where she's probably going to resign. These include the inability of her agency to work with her on anything at all. For instance, her being permamently assigned to a specific spot, where she was recently temporarily assigned. There would be no contractual breach, as their contract allows for officers to be moved to other spots "at the request of the supervisor". Essentially, our lives require her to be on day work. More specifically, the area where she just worked had the hours of 0630-1430. I start work at 1500, so we simply traded off kids where I work at.
Not the best, but an acceptable, solution. So, she didn't have those hours in one division, but was on day work (patrol) in a different one. Those hours overlapped my start time by 30 minutes, which didn't work. So, she got a TDY to this other spot, and was hoping to get a permanent spot. One got put up, but a more senior person was awarded it. No biggie, as there are several more vacancies, but her major refuses to post the spots for them. In addition, she (and a couple of other senior folks...like with almost a decade or more of service each) were moved to other shifts in the division, yet the major allowed the newbies who just came off of FTO to remain.
In other words, plenty of spots, and she could probably get one, but the major won't post them...nothing we can do about it contractually, either.
Some of you may be asking why we don't just get daycare...well, because we have four kids, and we can't afford the $500/week it would cost. I already work 60 hours a week to pay bills, and am not going to kill myself for someone else to raise my kids.
Our previous daycare arrangements are no longer available, and that brings me to another problem....her mother. Her mom is in failing health, with numerous issues that include diabetes, congestive heart failure, and an inability to walk more than five steps at a time without sounding like she did a 100 yard sprint. Plus, she has bad knees, and that's not helping anything. In addition to all that, her mind is starting to go. She called me last week to talk to the wife, and couldn't remember my name. I've been her son-in-law for almost 12 years, and with her daughter for longer than that.
So, she put in for FMLA, and of course was approved....for unpaid leave. The chief will not allow her to use sick time (they have an unlimited amount) to help care for her mom right now...not even on an intermittent basis.
So, here's the current choices we have:
Stay there, move to late watch, and "try" to find somewhere the kids can spend the night when I'm not working all night (that's at least 3 days per week).
Stay on midwatch, and try to find money for a babysitter.
Talk to the chief and try to get a position elsewhere that fits our hours. (Doing that Monday)
Turn in her resignation, and find a new job. She's got 8 years in, on a 20 year and out plan.
Honestly, the last one is probably what's gonna happen. For those who share the same faith, it would seem that God wants her to move on...to what, we don't know, but things have progressed from hard, to harder, to impossible with her job. There have been things posted from time to time about her agency over in Coptalk, but if anyone wants the rundown, I'll do that in a different thread. Trust me when I say that there has been a mass exodus from her agency, and that around half of the officers on it have under three years on. Time was, every other person had 15+ on, and it wasn't odd to see 25 or more. But, it's rare to see a 20 year guy stay around, due to the issues the department presents its staff.
So, what would you all do? We have four kids, 3 of them are 5 or under. We homeschool, and that's not something even remotely on the table for changing. I do mornings, she did evenings, plus took them to their activites. Yeah, we work screwed up hours (my off duty and her special details screwed things up), but we strive to give the kids a regular life and some stability with our hours.
If she resigns, and cashes out her retirement, we'll have a substancial amount of money to hold us over on bills...somewhere around a year or so. But, should she do that, the retirement rules have changed, and if she goes back in, she starts over in the new system, which is 25 years and out, with other differences, as well.
If she finds another job (her degree is in biology), it won't likely pay as much. Plus, she'll be the new one in the office, so to speak, and will likely be the first to go if layoffs hit. With 8 years on, and a no-layoff clause in her contract, that's not happening.
Just wondering what the rest of you thought...and honestly, we'll likely end up divorced if she stays, simply because her job puts so much stress on us. Well....it's not her "job", it's the ****tards who run it. Check out www.lmpd.com and look at the stories and comments to see what morale is like, and how they're being screwed.
**** them, really.
And again...I know there's a member here who is on there. I'm asking you, as a friend, to keep this to yourself. Things are bad enough without putting this out as common knowledge around the department.
Oh, and for the one guy who I know to be from around here...PLEASE keep quiet about what you might read. You have my trust, so don't screw me over on it....
Anyway on to it -
This actually has nothing to do with my career. Oddly enough, my usually ****ed up agency is OK to work for, with the typical nonsense that accompanies any type of LE job, of course.
The problem lies with the wife's department. I'll try and make it brief, but a number of circumstances have brought us to a point to where she's probably going to resign. These include the inability of her agency to work with her on anything at all. For instance, her being permamently assigned to a specific spot, where she was recently temporarily assigned. There would be no contractual breach, as their contract allows for officers to be moved to other spots "at the request of the supervisor". Essentially, our lives require her to be on day work. More specifically, the area where she just worked had the hours of 0630-1430. I start work at 1500, so we simply traded off kids where I work at.
Not the best, but an acceptable, solution. So, she didn't have those hours in one division, but was on day work (patrol) in a different one. Those hours overlapped my start time by 30 minutes, which didn't work. So, she got a TDY to this other spot, and was hoping to get a permanent spot. One got put up, but a more senior person was awarded it. No biggie, as there are several more vacancies, but her major refuses to post the spots for them. In addition, she (and a couple of other senior folks...like with almost a decade or more of service each) were moved to other shifts in the division, yet the major allowed the newbies who just came off of FTO to remain.
In other words, plenty of spots, and she could probably get one, but the major won't post them...nothing we can do about it contractually, either.
Some of you may be asking why we don't just get daycare...well, because we have four kids, and we can't afford the $500/week it would cost. I already work 60 hours a week to pay bills, and am not going to kill myself for someone else to raise my kids.
Our previous daycare arrangements are no longer available, and that brings me to another problem....her mother. Her mom is in failing health, with numerous issues that include diabetes, congestive heart failure, and an inability to walk more than five steps at a time without sounding like she did a 100 yard sprint. Plus, she has bad knees, and that's not helping anything. In addition to all that, her mind is starting to go. She called me last week to talk to the wife, and couldn't remember my name. I've been her son-in-law for almost 12 years, and with her daughter for longer than that.
So, she put in for FMLA, and of course was approved....for unpaid leave. The chief will not allow her to use sick time (they have an unlimited amount) to help care for her mom right now...not even on an intermittent basis.
So, here's the current choices we have:
Stay there, move to late watch, and "try" to find somewhere the kids can spend the night when I'm not working all night (that's at least 3 days per week).
Stay on midwatch, and try to find money for a babysitter.
Talk to the chief and try to get a position elsewhere that fits our hours. (Doing that Monday)
Turn in her resignation, and find a new job. She's got 8 years in, on a 20 year and out plan.
Honestly, the last one is probably what's gonna happen. For those who share the same faith, it would seem that God wants her to move on...to what, we don't know, but things have progressed from hard, to harder, to impossible with her job. There have been things posted from time to time about her agency over in Coptalk, but if anyone wants the rundown, I'll do that in a different thread. Trust me when I say that there has been a mass exodus from her agency, and that around half of the officers on it have under three years on. Time was, every other person had 15+ on, and it wasn't odd to see 25 or more. But, it's rare to see a 20 year guy stay around, due to the issues the department presents its staff.
So, what would you all do? We have four kids, 3 of them are 5 or under. We homeschool, and that's not something even remotely on the table for changing. I do mornings, she did evenings, plus took them to their activites. Yeah, we work screwed up hours (my off duty and her special details screwed things up), but we strive to give the kids a regular life and some stability with our hours.
If she resigns, and cashes out her retirement, we'll have a substancial amount of money to hold us over on bills...somewhere around a year or so. But, should she do that, the retirement rules have changed, and if she goes back in, she starts over in the new system, which is 25 years and out, with other differences, as well.
If she finds another job (her degree is in biology), it won't likely pay as much. Plus, she'll be the new one in the office, so to speak, and will likely be the first to go if layoffs hit. With 8 years on, and a no-layoff clause in her contract, that's not happening.
Just wondering what the rest of you thought...and honestly, we'll likely end up divorced if she stays, simply because her job puts so much stress on us. Well....it's not her "job", it's the ****tards who run it. Check out www.lmpd.com and look at the stories and comments to see what morale is like, and how they're being screwed.
**** them, really.
And again...I know there's a member here who is on there. I'm asking you, as a friend, to keep this to yourself. Things are bad enough without putting this out as common knowledge around the department.
