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Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by lethal tupperwa, Mar 8, 2003.

  1. lethal tupperwa

    lethal tupperwa

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    Location:
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    Please pause a moment, reflect back, and take the following Multiple
    Choice test. (The events are actual cuts from past history. They
    actually happened! Do you remember?)

    1. In 1972 at the Munich Olympics, athletes were kidnapped and massacred
    by:
    a. Olga Corbitt
    b. Sitting Bull
    c. Arnold Schwartzeneger
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    2. In 1979, the U.S.! embassy in Iran was taken over by:
    a. Lost Norwegians
    b. Elvis
    c. A tour bus full of 80-year-old women
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    3. During the 1980's a number of Americans were kidnapped in Lebanon by:
    a. John Dillinger
    b. The King of Sweden
    c. The Boy Scouts
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    4. In 1983, the U.S. Marine barracks in Beirut was blown up by:
    a. A pizza delivery boy
    b. Pee Wee Herman
    c. Geraldo Rivera
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    5. In 1985 the cruise ship Achille Lauro was hijacked and a 70 year old
    American passenger was murdered and thrown overboard in his wheelchair
    by:
    a. The Smurfs
    b. Davy Jones
    c. The Little Mermaid
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    6. In 1985 TWA flight 847 was hijacked at Athens, and a U.S. Navy diver
    trying to rescue passengers was murdered by:
    a. Captain Kid
    b. Charles Lindbergh
    c. Mother Teresa
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    7. In 1988, Pan Am Flight 103 was bombed by:
    a. Scooby Doo
    b. The Tooth Fairy
    c. Butch Cassidy and The Sundance Kid
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    8. In 1993 the World Trade Center was bombed the first time by:
    a. Richard Simmons
    b. Grandma Moses
    c. Michael Jordan
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    9. In 1998, the U.S. embassies in Kenya and Tanzania were bombed by:
    a. Mr. Rogers
    b. Hillary, to distract attention from Wild Bill's women problems
    c. The World Wrestling Federation
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    10. On 9/11/01, four airliners were hijacked; two were used as missiles
    to take out the World Trade Center and of the remaining two, one crashed
    into the US Pentagon and the other was diverted to a crash by the
    passengers. Thousands of people were killed by:
    a. Bugs Bunny, Wiley E. Coyote, Daffy Duck and Elmer Fudd
    b. The Supreme Court of Florida
    c. Mr. Bean
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    11. In 2002 the United States fought a war in Afghanistan against:
    a. Enron
    b. The Lutheran Church
    c. The NFL
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    12. In 2002 reporter Daniel Pearl was kidnapped and murdered by:
    a. Bonny and Clyde
    b. Captain Kangaroo
    c. Billy Graham
    d. Muslim male extremists mostly between the ages of 17 and 40

    Nope, . . . I really don't see a pattern here to justify profiling, do
    you? So, to ensure we Americans never offend anyone, particularly
    fanatics intent on killing us, airport security screeners will no longer
    be allowed to profile certain people. They must conduct random searches
    of 80-year-old women, little kids, airline pilots with proper
    identification, Secret Service agents who are members of the President's
    security detail, 85-year old Congressmen with metal hips, and Medal of
    Honor winning former Governors.

    Let's send this to as many people as we can so that the Gloria Aldreds
    and other dunderhead attorneys along with Federal Justices that want to
    thwart common sense feel doubly ashamed of themselves. As the writer of
    the award winning story Forest Gump so aptly put it, "Stupid is as
    stupid does".
     
  2. WolfmanGK

    WolfmanGK Super Plump

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    Dude! SHH! they're trying to play out their peacefull religion thing!