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Police anecdotes...

Discussion in 'Cop Talk' started by Rabbi, Aug 3, 2011.

  1. Rabbi

    Rabbi The Bombdiggity Lifetime Member

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    The great silly cop anecdotes thread. Share yours please.

    For example, We dont get paid for what we do, we get paid for what we are willing to do

    Or

    We are here to save your *** not kiss it...
     
  2. Sharky7

    Sharky7 Boomshakalaka

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    I took this job because it combines my two loves. My love of helping people with my love of hurting people.
     

  3. Hack

    Hack Crazy CO Gold Member

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    We are a temperature gage. We measure the temperature of that portion of the inmate population assigned to us, as to overall temperament, social interaction, and as a warning to our superiors when things are about to blow up.
     
  4. Vigilant

    Vigilant

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    Me, a butthole?

    Don't try to make friends with me.
     
    Last edited: Aug 4, 2011
  5. CAcop

    CAcop

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    **** 'em. They can chew you up but they got to spit you back up.--Jimmy McNulty

    No call too small.

    There's no management like micromanagement.
     
  6. Dragoon44

    Dragoon44 Unfair Facist Lifetime Member

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    " I don't get paid to fight fair, only to win".

    "attitudes adjusted, while U wait."

    "admit nothing, deny everything, demand proof".

    " I don't care, I don't have to."

    "You came in here with information and a pretty face.......You can't leave with both."
     
  7. MeefZah

    MeefZah Cover is Code 3

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    Does this make me the grammer / spelling / definition dickhole?

    "An anecdote is a short and amusing or interesting story about a real incident or person. An anecdote is always presented as based on a real incident[1] involving actual persons, whether famous or not, usually in an identifiable place." -Wikipedia
     
  8. Patchman

    Patchman Florist

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    "Well, I guess I won't be getting a Christmas card from you this year, huh sir/madam?"


    "You may not have called us, but somebody called us. And now that I'm here, I can't just leave."
     
  9. PinkoCommie

    PinkoCommie Unusual Member

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    No. In order to earn that title, you would have to know how to spell "grammar" correctly.
     
  10. MeefZah

    MeefZah Cover is Code 3

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    Dang it.
     
  11. CanIhaveGasCash

    CanIhaveGasCash

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    If you run, you will only go to jail tired
     
  12. pal2511

    pal2511

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    Sure I will give you a warning, the next time you speed you will get another ticket.

    :)
     
  13. wprebeck

    wprebeck Got quacks?

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    Guy asked me something similar last week as I was citing him for panhandling (a big problem where I work off duty). He asked for a break....I told him he WAS getting a break - i was citing him, instead of arresting him. I got a "God bless you" for his reply.
     
  14. Bruce M

    Bruce M

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    :rofl::rofl:
     
  15. Mayhem like Me

    Mayhem like Me Semper Paratus

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    my attitude and temperment is like a mirror you get back what you give...
     
  16. msu_grad_121

    msu_grad_121 BOOSH

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    "Win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat."

    "No sir, in fact, I'm TOUGHER when I take off this gun and badge."
     
  17. x_out86

    x_out86

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    Answer to any question about why I am/am not doing this/that, stopping somebody else, or other various questions???

    "We live in a complex world"
     
  18. slama683

    slama683

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    I can't make you do anything, but I can make you wish you had.

    "I guess I must be wearing my stupid face?" Sgt. Pruss
     
  19. DaBigBR

    DaBigBR No Infidels!

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    Don't love the job, it won't love you back.
     
  20. phred119

    phred119

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    Whats that? You didn't think we wrote tickets to pretty women? You're right, we don't. Sign here please.