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Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by okie, Apr 24, 2009.

  1. okie

    okie GT Mayor

    Likes Received:
    Oct 28, 2001
    Muskogee Ok.
    A woman's dishwasher had stopped working, so she called a repairman.

    He couldn't accommodate her with an evening appointment, and since she had to go to work the next day, she told him "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you the check. By the way, dont worry about my Rottweiler. He wont bother you. But, whatever you do, do not under any circumstances talk to my parrot!"

    When the repairman arrived at her apartment the next day, he discovered the biggest and meanest looking Rottweiler he had ever seen. Like she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet, watching the repairman go about his business. However, the whole time he was there, the parrot drove him nuts with its incessant squawking and talking.

    Finally the repairman couldn't stand the parrot's talking any longer and he told the bird to be quiet.

    The parrot replied, "Get him, Brutus!"
  2. jtull7

    jtull7 Pistolero CLM

    Likes Received:
    Jan 27, 2006
    Santa Fe, New Mexico
    Okie, that reminds me of this one:

    Acme Go-rilla Removal Service

    A guy was watching TV and the picture starts going haywire. He goes out side and, lo and behold, there is a go-rilla hanging from the antenna.

    He goes back inside, looks in the yellow pages under go-rilla, and sees Acme Go-rilla Removal Service. He calls and they say they’ll be right out.

    A van arrives. A man gets out with a long stick, a ladder, a big net, a mean-looking bulldog, and a shotgun. The customer asks him what he is going to do.

    He says “I’m going to climb the ladder and poke the go-rilla with the stick until he falls down. Then the bulldog will bite by the balls and hold him until I can throw the net over him. Problem solved.”

    “What about the shotgun?”

    “If I fall off the ladder before the go-rilla falls down, shoot the bulldog!”