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Out of the mouths of.......

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Eddie C., Jun 4, 2003.

  1. Eddie C.

    Eddie C. Administrator Moderator CLM

    Messages:
    5,094
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    Joined:
    Feb 21, 2002
    Location:
    State of Confusion
    These are real answers given by children. (Only children could come up with
    this, and keep a straight face!)


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    Q: Name the four seasons.
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    A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
    ****************************************************************************

    Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
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    A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants
    like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
    ****************************************************************************

    Q: How is dew formed?
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    A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
    ****************************************************************************

    Q: How can you delay milk turning sour?
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    A: Keep it in the cow.
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    Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
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    A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to
    flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature
    hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
    ****************************************************************************

    Q: What are steroids?
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    A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
    ******************************************************************************

    Q: What happens to your body as you age?
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    A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental.
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    Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
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    A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery.
    **************************************************************************
    Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
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    A: Premature death.
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    Q: What is artificial insemination?
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    A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow.
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    Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? (e.g., abdomen).
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    A: The body is consisted into three parts - the brainium, the borax and the
    abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the
    heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels, A,E,I,O
    and U.
    ****************************************************************************

    Q: What is the fibula?
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    A: A small lie.
    ****************************************************************************

    Q: What does "varicose" mean?
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    A: Nearby.
    **************************************************************************
    Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section"
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    A: The Caesarean Section is a district in Rome.
    ****************************************************************************

    Q: What does the word "benign" mean?
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    A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.