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"Operating Systems"

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Glockdude1, Oct 25, 2006.

  1. Glockdude1

    Glockdude1 Federal Member CLM

    Joined:
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    Location:
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    "Operating Systems"

    Dear Tech Support:

    Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed
    that
    the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot
    of
    space and valuable resources.

    In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now
    monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night
    10.3,
    Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Golfing 3.6.

    I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run
    my
    favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend
    7.0,
    but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!

    Thanks,
    Troubled User.....

    _____________________________________
    REPLY:
    Dear Troubled User:

    This is a very common problem that men complain about.

    Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it
    is
    just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING
    SYSTEM
    and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also
    impossible
    to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0. It is impossible
    to
    uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

    You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to
    not
    allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony/Child
    Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the
    situation. I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear"
    to
    alleviate software augmentation.

    The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE!
    because
    ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the
    system
    will return to normal anyway.

    Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance.
    Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep
    3.0,
    Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2.

    However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will
    cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens,
    the
    only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase
    additional
    software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0!

    WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With
    Short
    Skirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will
    cause
    irreversible damage to the operating system!

    Best of luck,

    Tech Support

    :supergrin: