Bush and Osama decided to settle the war once and for all. They sat down and decided to settle the whole dispute with one dog fight. They would have 5 years to breed the best fighting dog in the world and whichever side's dog won would be entitled to dominate the world. Osama found the biggest, meanest Doberman and Rottwieler female dogs in the world and bred them with the meanest Siberian wolves. They selected only the biggest and strongest puppy from the litter, and removed his siblings, which gave him all the milk. After 5 years, they came up with the biggest, meanest dog the world had ever seen. Its cage needed steel bars that were 5" thick and nobody could get near it. When the day came for the dog fight, Bush showed up with a strange looking animal. It was a 9-foot-long Dachshund. Everyone felt sorry for Bush because there was no way that this dog could possibly last 10 seconds with the Afghanistan dog. When the cages were opened up, the Dachshund came out of it's cage and slowly waddled over towards Osama's dog. Osama's dog snarled and leaped out of it's cage and charged the American Dachshund--but when it got close enough to bite, the Dachshund opened it's mouth and consumed Osama's dog in one bite. There was nothing left of his dog at all. Osama came up to Bush, shaking his head in disbelief. We don't understand how this could have happened. We had our best people working for 5 years with the meanest Doberman and Rottwieler female dogs in the world and the biggest, meanest Siberian wolves." "That's nothing," said Bush. "We had the best plastic surgeons working for 5 years to make that alligator look like a weenie dog."