Offshoot of the "spouse vs. career" thread...

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by HollowHead, Oct 19, 2019.

  1. Haldor

    Haldor Formerly retired EE.

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    Doesn't mean we have let ourselves be abused for the rest of our lives because we were fooled or made a mistake. I have experienced both and I wouldn't wish that on anyone.
     
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  2. M2 Carbine

    M2 Carbine

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    Oh, I forgot to include in my earlier post about telling my Wife about the good looking, nice smelling Woman I was flying around the Gulf of Mexico........

    Over water the Pilot and passengers wore "May West" life jackets.

    Buck May West.jpg

    After a few hours flying to different platforms and getting to know the Woman, I told Her,

    "I'm going to have trouble with the next male front seat passenger."

    She asked, "Why?".

    I said, "That May West you have been wearing, smells so good from you wearing it, the next Man that puts it on may become emotionally involved."

    She got a laugh from that and thought it was quite a compliment. :)
     

  3. Ordell Robbie

    Ordell Robbie Giant Member

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    I know the "Times are changing" line sounds cliché but in the last couple of generations they really have as far as marriage goes. It's not the necessity it used to be and both men and women are much more capable of making it on their own today without a spouse. In a way I think that's a good thing because some people just shouldn't be married.

    That said, if you are going to commit to a traditional marriage, husband, wife, kids and all that comes with it, then all that has to take priority....
     
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  4. Haldor

    Haldor Formerly retired EE.

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    I stayed until my youngest finished high school. If not for that I would have bailed a decade earlier.
     
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  5. Ordell Robbie

    Ordell Robbie Giant Member

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    My wife and I were in our 30's before we got married and had kids and I think we are better today than we were 16 years ago when we got married.

    Did you get married at a young age? I only ask because I've heard this before and it always seems to be people that were married with kids before they were 25.
     
  6. HollowHead

    HollowHead Firm member

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    My wife and are far from perfect (her, much less so) but I can assure you that we are not sinners as your earlier post inferred. HH
     
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  7. Z71bill

    Z71bill

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    I have no regrets about getting married.

    But there is NFW I would ever get married again.

    I know two people that both got divorced at about the same time -both had long - like 30-35 year marriages -

    The guy is almost 60 - the woman 55 -

    They were both remarried - one within a year - the other two years.

    I also have a friend - his mom died - his dad is in his mid 80's and he hooked up with his old HS sweetheart - she has been divorced multiple times -

    Why would anyone that is 80 get married??

    They lived together for a few months first.
     
  8. peng

    peng

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    These posts gave me a headache reading them.

    No offense intended, really - but are you guys saying you would choose to be miserable in a loveless marriage forever because of your belief in a mystical 3rd party who may or may not exist?

    That did not come out right I'm sure, let me try again. If the point of marriage is between 2 people who want to be happy together, when one or both is no longer happy, is there a point to the union and should it continue? I would at least understand if children were involved.
     
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  9. AK_Stick

    AK_Stick AAAMAD

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    Absolutely. If you really loved them you’d leave and let them find someone else who loves them.
     
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  10. OGW

    OGW SAF

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    You have to believe in make believe, or you're a lesser man.
     
  11. fg17

    fg17

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    Don’t want to put words in the guy your replying to. But I think he means because you haven’t been “saved” or some other man made religious mumbo jumbo.
     
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  12. fg17

    fg17

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    No ****. I don’t get it either. But I don’t get getting married if you don’t have children either. Yes I know there are legal reasons. I really don’t get 3rd marriages.
     
  13. GlockFan7

    GlockFan7

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    No offense taken. I've always taken my relationships very seriously. In fact, they were all wonderful ladies and I'm still in love with every one of them. My last girl friend was nearly 40 years ago and I still talk to her every day. My heart sings every time I see her. Over the years, she and my wife have become close friends and even travel together. I'd walk through fire for either of them. I am no greater or no less than my character. The mystical 3rd party of which you speak is me. I made a promise and I shall stand by it, no matter what. That's called commitment. We often bring misery upon ourselves and some people are more than willing to share their misery with others. I have a daughter like that.
     
  14. GlockFan7

    GlockFan7

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    Might be me some day.
     
  15. fg17

    fg17

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    Agreed. We only have one life and we’re dead in a minute, metaphorically speaking. Some people must not value their life’s that much. Or think it will get them into heaven which may or may not exist.

    That being said some people give up pretty easily. I love my wife, but for a lot of years argued all the time about EVERYTHING. We new people who got divorced that argued way way way less than we did.
     
  16. Jon_R

    Jon_R

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    I will buck the trend.

    Short answer is it depends. I have plans and goals if they are not compatible with a specific person things would probably need to change. For example I am over preparing for retirement and old age. I shall not be a burden on my children or anyone else. To support this I have a pretty demanding job and it keeps me busy. I am not agreeable to change it as something less will likely lead to me being unprepared and a burden on those I love and not acceptable. If that is not agreeable to a spouse then we have a problem.

    I currently do not have this problem but to say I would put a job over a person or a person over a job is more complicated to me then the simple answer people throw out. I also had the job 15 years before I met my spouse and she likes what it provides.
     
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  17. light-switch

    light-switch Back to work...

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    Nor do I wish it on you, but Christians are given the ultimate model to imitate, one who doesn't relent in forgiveness and grace, the Lord Jesus Himself.

    Sent from my Pixel 2 using Tapatalk
     
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  18. light-switch

    light-switch Back to work...

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    You and I have very different definitions for the word "sinner": mine comes from God's Word.

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  19. light-switch

    light-switch Back to work...

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    In my belief, the "mystical third party" does indeed exist, and as such, marriage is a COVENANT between God and my spouse and I. It is not simply an agreement between husband and wife, but something greater between a couple and their God. The point of marriage is not for the two of us to be together and happy - though that is the usual outcome - but for God to be glorified through our union in marriage.

    Sent from my Pixel 2 using Tapatalk
     
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  20. Jonesee

    Jonesee

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    :goodpost: Ditto for me.

    Another :goodpost:.