Monica Lewinsky was walking on the beach when she found a lantern washed up on the shore. She started to rub it and out popped a genie. "Oh goodie, now I will get three wishes!" she exclaimed. "No," said the genie, "You have been very bad this year, and because of this, I can only give you one wish." "Let's see," says Monica, "I don't need fame, because I have plenty of that due to all of the media coverage. And I don't need money, because after I write my book, and do all my interviews, I'll have all the money I could ever want. I would like to get rid of these love handles, though. Yes, that's it, for my one wish, I would like my love handles removed." "Poof!" And just like that......her ears were gone.