Mom's Dictionary

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by P-Ratt, Sep 13, 2002.

  1. P-Ratt

    P-Ratt Got GLOCK?

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    Jul 29, 2002
    Back home in TX!!
    DUMBWAITER: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
    FAMILY PLANNING: The art of spacing your children the proper distance apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster.
    FEEDBACK: The inevitable result when your baby doesn't appreciate the
    strained carrots.
    FULL NAME: What you call your child when you're mad at him.
    GRANDPARENTS: The people who think your children are wonderful, even though they're sure you're not raising them right.
    HEARSAY: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
    IMPREGNABLE: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.
    INDEPENDENT: How we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.
    OW: The first word spoken by children with older siblings.
    PUDDLE: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.
    SHOW OFF: A child who is more talented than yours.
    STERILIZE: What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it.
    TOP BUNK: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman pajamas.
    TWO MINUTE WARNING: When the baby's face turns red, and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.
    WHODUNIT: None of the kids that live in your house.