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Marriage

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by okie, Jul 30, 2004.

  1. okie

    okie GT Mayor

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    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2001
    Location:
    Muskogee Ok.
    What women want in a relationship: A handsome, loving professional
    man who will just love them for who they are.
    What women get: A fat, balding fart machine who stays with them only
    because no other woman wants him.

    What men want in a woman: A combination of Carol Brady and Pamela Lee
    Anderson; Wonderful Mom with big hooters and can suck the chrome off
    a flag pole.

    What men get: Someone who immediately begins to gain those 80 extra
    lbs the moment after she says "I Do", beginning with the wedding cake!

    What women want in bed: A passionate lover who takes the time to kiss
    and gently caress, slowly building up to a wonderful joyous experience
    together.

    What they get: "Wham-Bam-Thank-You Ma'am!", Belch, Fart, Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

    What men expect out of a marriage: 3 loving children who honor their
    parents.
    What they get: 3 helions who are a combination of their parents every
    fault and make their life a living hell.

    1st anniversary card from husband to wife: "My sweet loving wife....I
    hope this first year is a reflection of the next 60 years, you are my heart
    and soul, I am forever yours."

    5th anniversary card: "I love you so much honey...words cannot describe."

    10th anniversary card: "Hey, how's it hangin'? Love Ya'!!"

    15th anniversary card: "Ummmmmmmmm......'sup?"

    16th anniversary card from wife to husband: "You are hereby summoned
    to divorce proceedings..."
     
  2. seb

    seb

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    Jan 8, 2004
    Location:
    outskirts of nowhere

    Can I get this at the Hallmark store???