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Marriage, before & after

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by okie, Feb 28, 2004.

  1. okie

    okie GT Mayor

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    Marriage, before & after

    b- you take my breath away
    a- I feel like I'm suffocating

    b- she says she loves the way I take control of a situation
    a- she says I'm a controlling, manipulative egomaniac

    b- Lucy and Ricky
    a- Fred and Ethyl

    b- Saturday night fever
    a- Monday night football

    b- twice a night
    a- twice a month

    b- he makes me feel like a million dollars
    a- if I had a dime for every stupid thing he's done...

    b- don't stop
    a- don't start

    b- the sound of music
    a- the sounds of silence

    b- is that all you're having?
    a- maybe you should have just a salad, dear

    b- wheel of fortune
    a- jeopardy

    b- it's like I'm living in a dream
    a- it's like he lives in a dorm

    b- $60/doz.
    a- $1.50/stem

    b- turbocharged
    a- jumpstart

    b- we agree on everything
    a- doesn't she have a mind of her own?

    b- Victoria's Secret
    a- Fruit of the Loom

    b- charming and noble
    a- Chernobyl

    b- feathers and handcuffs
    a- ball and chain

    b- idol
    a- idle

    b- I love a woman with curves
    a- I never said you were fat

    b- he's completely lost without me
    a- why won't he ever ask for directions?

    b- time stood still
    a- this relationship is going nowhere

    b- croissant and cappuccino
    a- bagel and Folgers

    b- blind
    a- nearsighted

    b- you look so seductive in black
    a- your clothes are so depressing

    b- iambic pentameter
    a- blank verse

    b- oysters
    a- fishsticks

    b- I can hardly believe we found each other
    a- I can't believe I ended up with someone like you

    b- passion
    a- ration

    b- once upon a time
    a- the end