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Letter I Got From Santa Claus

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by lethal tupperwa, Nov 26, 2002.

  1. lethal tupperwa

    lethal tupperwa

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    Aug 20, 2002
    Location:
    Virginia
    Dear Friends:
    I have been watching you very closely to see if you have been good
    this year and since you have I will be telling my elves to make some
    goodies for me to leave under your tree at Christmas. I was going to bring
    you all gifts from the 12 days of Christmas, but we had a little problem.
    The 12 fiddlers fiddling have all come down with VD from fiddling with the
    10 ladies dancing, the 11 lords leaping have knocked up the 8 maids
    a-milking, and the 9 pipers piping have been arrested for doing weird things
    to the 7 swans a-swimming. The 6 geese a-laying, 4 calling birds, 3 French
    hens, 2 turtle doves and the partridge in a pear tree have me up to my sled
    runners in bird ****.
    On top of all this Mrs. Claus is going through menopause, 8 of my
    reindeer are in heat, the elves have joined the gay liberation and some
    people who can't read a calendar have scheduled Christmas for the 5th of
    January.
    Maybe next year I will be able to get my **** together and bring
    you the things you want. This year I suggest you get your asses down to
    Walmart before everything gone.

    Sincerely,

    Santa Claus