This won't seem like a typical Project Mayhem post, but I'm gonna post it here anyway, because I don't want to read all the dumb-**** posts that I'd see in the public forums. Additionally, I know TD is "one of those".
(Edit: SON OF A *****! I can't put the thread title in all caps!) :steamed:
About 13 years ago, these two dorks wearing ties rang my doorbell. I knew who they were by their nametags, but I've never held religion against anyone, so I let them in, offered them coffee, cokes, or water. They chose water.
I let them tell me their spiel, and I told them mine. We knelt and prayed to Heavenly Father together, and they went on their way.
A few days later, they showed up again, and we discussed religion briefly, then got into talking about martial arts. We knelt and prayed together, and they went on their way.
This became a regular occurrence, though they knew I didn't want to join their church, and I knew they weren't going to pressure me into anything. They were cool young men. My wife and I both enjoyed their company when they were around. My wife isn't into religion at all, but I have always found it fascinating.
I moved into another house and didn't see those guys again.
About ten years ago these two hot chicks with long dresses and black name tags knocked on my door. Of course, I invited them in, and they were much more passionate about their religion than the guys from a few years earlier. So I listened to their stories, they gave me literature, and I read every word of it. There was that part about "pray to Heavenly Father and ask him to show you if this book is true" (something like that). So I prayed, and nothing happened.
My wife and I both enjoyed their company, and it was nice to have guests who wouldn't drink my coffee, cokes, beer, or whiskey, so we told them that they were welcome anytime.
When they returned, they asked about it, and I told them that I did, and nothing happened. They said you gotta pray with an open heart. I took this to mean that if I really wanted to hear from God, that I would, even though it may only be a product of my imagination. I tabled that for later.
They gave me all sorts of literature, invited me to attend services with them on Sundays, and all sorts of cool things. I read all the literature, "Marvelous Work and Wonder", "Pearl Necklace", "Pulp Fiction", and, of course, "The Book of Mormon". I actually read the BoM a few times because it was interesting as hell.
What struck me as strange, was how Joseph Smith was visited by humanoids with transporter technology, in his primitive American bedroom.
As I read his account of how the bright lights appeared and this guy then appeared from them, I could hear the trilling/buzzing sound of the transporter from Star Trek. I thought that was cool as hell.
The other times he was visited, it also seemed like something from Star Trek.
The "plates" which he had to translate may well have been some sort of digital storage media.
So the poor bastard was duped by aliens, visitors from the future, or perhaps from another dimension. He spent his life being tormented by these high-tech jokers, and ultimately died because of it.
Damn those rogue federation outlaws who ignore the prime directive!
Anyway, I was invited to be baptized into their church, but my heart could never be in it, and I'd always consider myself a liar for telling people that I believe in something which I don't. My wife said she reckons there are plenty of members who don't truly believe, but just put on a facade so that they can have the benefits of membership.
No one can deny that when it's the end of the world as we know it, it would be a good time to be a Mormon.
As an aside, I ran into one of the missionaries a few years ago. He got a job as a roustabout on a rig I was working on. He was a cool kid.
