close

Privacy guaranteed - Your email is not shared with anyone.

Keep Away From The Kids

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by lethal tupperwa, Jul 10, 2003.

  1. lethal tupperwa

    lethal tupperwa

    Messages:
    9,470
    Likes Received:
    1,619
    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2002
    Location:
    Virginia
    Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from
    the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to God's
    kids. After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve.
    And the first thing he said was, "Don't."

    "Don't what?" Adam replied. "Don't eat the forbidden fruit," God
    said. Forbidden fruit? We got forbidden fruit? Hey, Eve...we got
    forbidden fruit!"

    "No way!"

    "Way!"

    "Don't eat that fruit!" said God.

    "Why?"

    "Because I am your Father and I said so!" said God (wondering why
    he hadn't stopped after making the elephants). A few minutes
    later God saw his kids having an apple break and was angry.
    "Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?" God asked.

    "Uh huh, " Adam replied.

    "Then why did you?"

    "I dunno" Eve answered.

    "She started it!" Adam said.

    "Did not!"

    "Did too!"

    "DID NOT!"

    Having had it with the two of them, God's punishment was that
    Adam and Eve should have children of their own. Thus the pattern
    was set and it has never changed. If God had trouble handling
    children, what makes you think it would be a piece of cake for
    you?

    Advice for the day: If you have a lot of tension and you get a
    headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: Take two and
    keep away from children.