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Jennifer's Jag

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Bill Powell, Jul 9, 2004.

  1. Bill Powell

    Bill Powell Cross Member CLM

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    Jennifer had just gotten a gift of a perfectly restored Jaguar, and was out trying it out. It was a guards red XK-150, and it and Jen were looking good. She was cooking along about forty five or fifty in first gear, in a 30 MPH zone. A motorcycle cop pulled in behind her and turned on the lights. She thought that cop had a lot of nerve, so she shifted to second, and kicked it up to about seventy, cop right on her tail. Well, Jennifer was not a bad girl, but she was feeling frisky, so she hit third gear and 100 MPH, cop right on her tail. "This just will not do," said Jen, so she hit fourth, and 150 MPH, and no cop. After a little while, still no cop.

    She was getting a little concerned so she turned around and went back, where she found the bike in a ditch, and the cop all scuffed up. "Officer, what happened?" asked Jennifer. "Well Maam, you took off from so fast that last time I thought my motorcycle had stopped, so I jumped off to see what was wrong with it."
     
  2. Eddie C.

    Eddie C. Administrator Moderator CLM

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    Good one Bill!^c ;i
     

  3. Bill Powell

    Bill Powell Cross Member CLM

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    I thought soem of the people might get a kick out of seeing their name used like this. I did one for Okie, too, about sky diving. I'll either re-write very old stories, or make up new ones. It's fun.
     
  4. okie

    okie GT Mayor

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    ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z ;z
     
  5. joegerardi

    joegerardi Lifetime Member Millennium Member

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    Bill:
    As a Jag owner (X-Type) I can speak with some authority and state there is no "Guards Red" color for Jaguar. Please change it to British Racing Green post haste, before descended upon by hordes of angry Jag owners sniffing for blood over using crappy Porsche colors on a REAL car! :)

    ..Joe
     
  6. BLAZE

    BLAZE

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    [​IMG]



    Thank you Billy. Im glad you like my car...
    Want to go for a ride?;f ;f ;f ;f :)

    Nice story.:)
     
  7. Bill Powell

    Bill Powell Cross Member CLM

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    joegerardi, look directly beneath your post at the XK-150. Since the restorers discovered red, you would would think almost every old sportscar was painted that color. we're working on three XK-150s now. one is green, one is burgandy, and one is eggshell white. i used to have an XK-120 with two one and seven eighths inch pipes running from the exhaust manifolds out the back of the car. damn that car was fun in those little narrow mountain passes in Arizona. speak-um much noisy. I did a brake job on a 1949 Ferrari awhile back. It was a funky mint (sort of) green.

    See how that works, Jennifer? I turned on my ESP, thought about it for a second, and used your very own car for my story. I guess I'm lucky you didn't own a Rambler american, huh........bill

    Oh, joegerardi, one more thought. The Jaguar owner's club use to have their club meetings at our museum occasionally. As Jaguar owners will, they were standing around, *****ing about their cars. I asked for, and finally got their attention. "Gentlemen." says I, "there is nothing wrong with your Jaguar automobile that a Ford or Chevrolet engine won't cure." They will not abide outsiders bad mouthing their Jags. I thought they were going to try to string me up.
     
  8. BLAZE

    BLAZE

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    [​IMG]

    This is the new one im going to be getting soon.;f ;f
    Do you like it? Ill make sure you are the first to get a ride.:) :) :) ^c ~2
     
  9. Bill Powell

    Bill Powell Cross Member CLM

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    that's the ferrari enzo. i've driven that car. it's faster than a chevrolet. see if you can find a ferrari F-40 in your picture book. we had three of those.
     
  10. BLAZE

    BLAZE

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  11. BLAZE

    BLAZE

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    BLAZE

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  13. BLAZE

    BLAZE

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  14. BLAZE

    BLAZE

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  15. BLAZE

    BLAZE

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  16. BLAZE

    BLAZE

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    BLAZE

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  18. BLAZE

    BLAZE

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  19. BLAZE

    BLAZE

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  20. BLAZE

    BLAZE

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    [​IMG]

    Maybe this one is my favorite
    ;f :) :) :) :) ;f