Is my GF a prostitute?

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by DaisyCutter, May 2, 2007.

  1. DaisyCutter

    DaisyCutter Guest

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    Yesterday

    I've been dating a spectacular woman for a few weeks now. She's freakishly intelligent, cooks gourmet food, takes amazing care of me, is beautiful, and screws better than most porn stars (she does stuff that I haven't even seen in hardcore films).

    At any rate, her PC broke last week and she asked me to retrieve a specific email from her account for her. Curiosity got the better of me and after-word I snooped her email a bit. I discovered several employment offers/inquiries with some high-end escort and call-girl services (dating back a few months, prior to meeting me). Suddenly several other notable things about her added up... her dad kicking her out of the house when she was 14yo, her current schedule, her night-owl lifestyle, the way she dances with the girls at the strip clubs she takes me to, her huge savings account, all the past places she's lived, her freaky nature in bed, demanding blood tests prior to us having intercourse, etc.

    My intuition tells me that most people probably don't decide to try this profession (for the first time) at 25yo...

    I really like this woman. She does sooo much for me and thinks I'm the greatest thing. In reality, it wouldn't bother me if this is a thing of the past. Currently, she's in school for message therapy (gives a great message).


    Late last night

    I tactfully inquired about the emails late last night. Initially, she became irritated at me. However, I held my ground and reminded her that she told me to access her email & that any man who sees "Desert Divas" + "employment" on the subject line of an email in his GF's mailbox is going to click-away.

    So then she told me that she was looking for a message job, and was surprised to see that some responses indicated prostitution. Afterword, she tried to change the subject to my lack of integrity for looking at her emails.

    Then I countered with the fact that "Desert Divas" is 100% a prostitution thing, there's no mistaking it for a legit message place (even for a geek like me). So her story changed to, "I had a car wreck and a lot of medical bills... I was stressing out and a friend suggested I try being an escort. But when it came right down to it, I just couldn't do it. I've done many questionable things, but I've never sold my ass."

    Effectively, her argument was very pathetic for a woman of her intelligence... equivalent to the path of:

    total denial >> to blame shifting >> to very limited acknowledgement and large excuse making... that my 6yo uses when I catch him flushing his brussels sprouts down the toilet.

    I didn't accuse her, I simply asked her what the nature of the emails was. I also stated that if that type of work was a thing from her past, it wouldn't bother me (it really wouldn't). However, I don't know how I'd handle it if she were still "practicing".

    Still, my gut tells me that I don't know everything. IMO, NOBODY considers making a career change to "call-girl/escort" at the age of 25/26... as I'm guessing that all the 25/26yo prostitutes are veterans.

    However, if she does/has-done this kind of thing, I can't understand her overlooking it when she asked me to open her email account?

    Truthfully, I would've been more at-ease if she'd simply said, "I used to be an escort for a couple years, but didn't like what the future held in that line of work."


    Whaddya think, was/is she a hooker Y/N?



    FWIW, I am hugely attracted to uninhibited women. She takes really good care of me. Im 29, twice divorced with two kids from the second marriage, have a vasectomy (no "oops honey" factor), and I really have no intentions of getting married a 3rd time anytime soon. She may be my ideal playmate.

    My big problem is that I don't have a lot of "street smarts". Both my ex-wives had long-term affairs behind my back. I really don't think I'm observant enough to "know" what she's doing nor do I have the energy/desire to "check-up" on someone.

    My plan now is to guard my heart a bit more and just try to enjoy the ride. It'll be tough since I'm actually a total romantic, which makes it hard not to get attached and also causes "abused women" fall in love with me (for a while).

    I posted this for the women, is there anything you can dissect from this? Would you take what she says at face value, or would you suspect that I'm being lied to? I hate to sound negative, but in my experience women never tell me the truth. I'm open and honest, which seems to indicate to people that I need to be fed lies.
     
  2. BL33D 4 M3

    BL33D 4 M3

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    Is your name John?
     

  3. DaisyCutter

    DaisyCutter Guest

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    Worse, my name is "Mark".



    mark - a person who is gullible and easy to take advantage of
    chump, fall guy, gull, patsy, soft touch, sucker, mug, fool
    dupe, victim - a person who is tricked or swindled.


    I'm lucky to be tall, handsome, successful, adventurous, smart, etc. And in the words of my LEO ex-father-in-law (who told me his own daughter was having an affair)... "You live in a polyanna world and I love you for it. You really have no idea of what happens in the real world, do you?"
     
  4. magmeister

    magmeister Guest

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    Are you in the Phoenex area?
    If so ,I think I um, know your girlfriend.:shocked:
     
  5. DaisyCutter

    DaisyCutter Guest

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    PM sent. Well see.
     
  6. WINGS

    WINGS CLM

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    If it *******s, floats or flys....rent it.
     
  7. CCMO

    CCMO Guest

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    Always wear a rubber, DON'T make any marriage plans, and otherwise enjoy! Either you will both will eventually go your separate ways, or she may eventually change her lifestyle to something you find "long term" acceptable. No harm, no foul.
     
  8. Mrs. Tink

    Mrs. Tink Semper Fidelis

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    Here's my take.

    First, with the email thing--she might have thought she could TRUST you with not going through the rest of her emails. As you said, for many people, this expectation is not a good one. That is why she kept coming back to the issue of your integrity. Anyone who trusts you will be irritated or worse when you break the trust. Regardless of whether or not you had found any suspicious e-mails, your curiosity translated into a violation of her privacy, whether you thought it was reasonable or not.

    Two perspectives: 1) She wanted to see whether you would snoop through her emails. That was probably a little test. Since you failed spectacularly ("holding your ground" against her completely correct accusations against you?), she probably had a game plan for what was going to happen. You said that you noticed things about her that in retrospect "added up." Suppose, then, that she thought that you were adding them up BEFOREHAND? Maybe she thought you were wondering about it, and thought that this would be a good way to bring up the subject in a roundabout way. Weird, yeah, but it's easier when you do it, as opposed to "I have something to tell you..."

    In that case, I don't think she'd lie. I would take her comment at face value. The way she phrased it suggests to me that she found the whole subject to be embarrassing.

    2) She thinks you're great. She has a ton of fun with you. But lo and behold, you stumble upon this email (which in this case I suspect she really didn't want you to go looking for anything but what she asked you to look for). You confront her. Does she know that you would not mind whether she was a call girl in the past? Have you randomly said, "Hey, just wanted to let you know, in case you were ever a prostitute... it's OK with me"? I kind of doubt it.

    Most men like to have fun with this kind of woman, but quickly move on. She might have resisted telling you the full truth in this case.

    Your description makes me lean toward #1. Face it, you probably DON'T know everything. Even open, honest people have things that they are reluctant to discuss. But you have little choice but to take her word for it. Or dump her.

    P.S. Demanding blood tests is smart in this day and age. Most women either don't have the courage, or are too ignorant, to do it.
     
  9. FastJuice

    FastJuice NozeBleedSpeed

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    Dude, dont be an idiot! By your own testimony, shes beautiful, cooks and screws like a porn star.
    If she just owned a beer truck she would be the perfect woman...
     
  10. SARDG

    SARDG Florida's Left Coast

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    I've got to generally agree with Mrs. Tink - it was an invasion of her privacy and a violation of trust. And I like Mrs. Tink's other perspectives as well.

    I actually had a friend who was a prostitute and I thought she was really great - quite normal actually, and quite a good friend. She worked a regular 9-5 job, but usually spent Saturday nights, otherwise occupied. She had two darling children who did very well in school and grew up completely normal. They were NOT neglected or starved and as a matter of fact probably had more advantages than some of their classmates or the other neighborhood kids. This was about 20 years ago and I would imagine that her kids (now grown) never did find out. I used to watch them for her once in a while on Saturday nights when they weren't with their Dad. (This lady was divorced.)

    This gal was also intelligent, and by all indications, was well respected by her clients. She was NOT cheap AT ALL! ($). Another thing; as far as I know, she didn't begin in that profession until she was in her mid-thirties.

    I suppose the point is, prostitutes are people, too. It's in your court - how will you handle it?

    SARDoG
    (Kitty)
     
  11. WIG19

    WIG19 Light left on

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    Broken trust (by you); here endeth the lesson. Move on.

    :patriot:
     
  12. Tilley

    Tilley Man of Steel

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    "Was your girlfriend good in bed when you first met her? Ever wonder how she got that way?" Andrew Dice Clay.

    You don't trust her and she does not trust you. Don't confuse lust for love. You have a long history of picking immoral women, so why in the world would you ever consider this girl for a possible mate? Don't be a glutton for punishment and find yourself a good girl.
     
  13. DaisyCutter

    DaisyCutter Guest

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    I was born a risk taker/adrenaline junkie. I ride bulls, race dirtbikes, commute to work on a 1200cc streetbike, snowboard, wakeboard...

    and I like strong/aggressive/edgy women.



    I'm positive this one will break my heart (likely not as bad as the last one that divorced me, or the first one that divorced me). I'm pretty sure that she is/was a sex-worker of some kind, likely an escort...

    *the ability to converse intelligently with anyone about any topic.
    *the fine food
    *the message/message-school
    *the insane screwing
    *the fact that she can "live off savings"



    All those things are what wealthy and lonely or busy men pay good money for. The up-frontness about a blood test makes perfect sense now.


    I'm for dang sure enjoying it and I'm curious to find out more. FWIW, I've had my vasectomy, so no matter what NOBODY is getting pregnant. I'm not looking to start another family, this was probably a very fortunate meeting.

    DC out.
     
  14. hapuna

    hapuna Trusted Member

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    If she's from the area have a background check done and check her arrest record. This is usually done by someone that is going to rent a house to her and is easily done and will give you a good idea of what you have.
     
  15. kcb

    kcb Southern Lady

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    I'm sorry...:upeyes:

    But is "message school"...anything like "massage school"?

    :dunno:

    Or do some women need to go to school to take messages?

    :headscratch:
     
  16. DaisyCutter

    DaisyCutter Guest

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    "massage", I apologize repetitive finger memory syndrome. Sometimes I type "of" instead of "or" due to my fingers typing from memorized keystrokes.
     
  17. kjm1016

    kjm1016

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    If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, chances are, . . . . . . . . . .it's a duck. :upeyes: So if you don't mind dating a hooker, quit snooping, drop the moralizing, and get used to it. Enjoy the ride while it lasts, because it probably won't last long. If, on-the-other-hand, the idea of dating an active hooker does bother you, pull your head out of rectal defilade, and head on down the road. Don't look back. You may have something truly rare and valuable. But then again, you may be holding a ticking time bomb. Try thinking about this using the head on your shoulders, not the one between your legs. That will help. Good Luck!
     
  18. Atlantya

    Atlantya

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    rectal defilade? :animlol: Not exactly sure what that is, but I can guess and I would guess it's not exactly pleasant. Good advice, kjm1016.
     
  19. IMHerDad

    IMHerDad

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    Dude just wear it out while you can. If it ends, then it ends and you will move on.

    Trust me, if you dump her, curiosity will kill the cat.:thumbsup:
     
  20. Singlemalt

    Singlemalt In the rough

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    Well, in reference to girls not trying "escorting" at 25 or 26 is not true. I knew this girl who was 25, smoking hot, beautiful face, body and legs that well, you get the picture.

    Anyway, she was smart but was not making much money. She had a friend who was an escort, she saw the money she made, her car, shopping trips and you name it.

    So, yep, at 25 she entered the escort business and made a big ole chunk of money. She is "out of the business" now but she certainly does everything she can to hide this part of her past to anyone she dates. I think your girl fits this.