I think my neighbors might be swingers

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by Boo Berry, Apr 7, 2020.

  1. Boo Berry

    Boo Berry Fair lady, your chariot awaits.

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    Or maybe I just have cabin fever... y’all decide.

    They’ve lived across the street for 13 years. We’re very friendly with them, but I’d stop short of calling them friends. We occasionally socialize with them, frequently dog sit for them, chat in the yard a lot, and we even attended their daughter’s wedding.

    So here’s why I’m suddenly suspicious.

    Last night Mrs Boo remarked that the neighbors have a cute little pineapple ornament in the shrubs outside their front door. (I must never have noticed it.). I joked that they’re probably swingers. She didn’t know what I meant by that, and didn’t believe me when I explained, so she Googled it, and down the rabbit hole she went.

    https://www.google.com/amp/s/nypost.com/2017/06/02/secret-signs-your-neighbor-might-be-a-swinger/amp/

    My neighbors check the following swinger code sign boxes:

    Garden gnome... check
    Flamingo yard ornament... check
    Pineapple yard ornament... check
    Hot tub... check
    Pampas grass... check
    Anklet (she)... check
    Toe ring (she)... check

    On the circumstantial side, they’ve always seemed just slightly unusual, and do tend to speak freely about sex. I remember one time the wife over there mentioned to me something about a midnight mailbox club, where they sometimes walk down to the mailbox at midnight naked. I laughed it off, thinking it was a joke, but now I’m wondering if she was testing my reaction.

    I guess they’re just slightly odd enough that I wouldn’t be surprised if they are swingers. Too many itsy bitsy signals that may have seemed insignificant at the time, but strung together in retrospect have both of us wondering if the neighbors are hosting key parties across the street.

    So... cabin fever? Or exciting new world?

    upload_2020-4-7_10-46-2.jpeg
     
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  2. rock_castle

    rock_castle All Lives Matter

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  3. DonGlock26

    DonGlock26

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  4. FullClip

    FullClip Native Mainiac CLM

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    Think you need a professional opinion on this matter.

    Calling @G30SF/F-250 ...front and center for assistance please.
     
  5. MulletLoad

    MulletLoad

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    I knew something was going on under the sea.

    [​IMG]
     
  6. Ramjet38

    Ramjet38 Mentally Frozen

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  7. bgirls

    bgirls

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    Is she HAWT? Asking for
    G30SF/F-250
     
  8. Boo Berry

    Boo Berry Fair lady, your chariot awaits.

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    Oh hell no.
     
  9. Hannie Caulder

    Hannie Caulder Diva extraordinaire

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    No, it just means they're tacky.

    Mind your business.


    And I thought I was nosy!
     
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  10. varget

    varget

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    people can and will do whatever they want. makes me no never mind.
     
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  11. snappy

    snappy

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    Is she a 2 bagger? One for her head and one for yours in case hers comes off?
     
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  12. M&P15T

    M&P15T All Hail King Kona

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  13. MulletLoad

    MulletLoad

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    He just didn't say "No", he said "hell no".

    We might be talking "Mama June" with unwashed fat creases and stretch mark tats.
     
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  14. Aurora

    Aurora

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    If all this was true, then all the residents of Florida and California are swingers.

    V.
     
  15. MikeG22

    MikeG22 CLM

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  16. Rotn1

    Rotn1

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    You just never know. Live and let live.

    In our younger days, women were constantly hitting on my wife. I though it was amusing.

    When we moved to Chicago the neighborhood we lived in had a bunch of couples that mixed things up. Hot tub parties turned into house keys in the punch bowl. We didn’t partake.

    We returned to Chi a few years later and stayed at a ex neighbors home .....a divorcée. She outright propositioned my wife and I at dinner....... nope.

    I learned that one of my ex employees ( and his spouse) in PA were hardcore swingers. He was canvassing all the attractive couples from that branch........ that’s a big no Ghost-rider. Not a good look for work!

    Don’t look too hard, you will probably find more than you want.
     
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  17. PBCounty

    PBCounty

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    Are we in 9th grade? What side is his earring on?? Did you hear The New Kids on the Block are gay?
     
  18. Rotn1

    Rotn1

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    Does it take just one Pink Flamingo to be tacky or some specific number or flock?
     
  19. 'Ol Grandad

    'Ol Grandad Director of civil unrest

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    Have a couple of drinks with them and then ask. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
     
  20. PBCounty

    PBCounty

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    I was shopping yard ornaments the other day (settled on a blue heron) when I came across a 150 pack of pink flamingos at Home Depot. 150. I assume that's meant for opening day at a new trailer park or something.