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Humorus Daffinitions

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Nowhere Man, Dec 2, 2005.

  1. Nowhere Man

    Nowhere Man

    Likes Received:
    May 22, 2003
    North Port, FL
    The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again
    asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by
    adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new
    definition. Here are this year's 2005 winners:

    1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which
    renders the subject financially impotent for an
    indefinite period.

    2. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an

    3. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund,which
    lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

    4. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

    5. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people
    that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The
    bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of
    breaking down in the near future.

    6. Foreploy: Any misrepresentation about yourself for
    the purpose of getting laid.

    7. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

    8. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic
    wit and the person who doesn't get it.

    9. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you
    are running late.

    10. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.

    11. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease. (This one got
    extra credit.)

    12. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending
    off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like,
    the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

    13. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting
    through the day consuming only things that are good
    for you.

    14. Glibido: All talk and no action.

    15. Dopeler effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to
    seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

    16. Arachnoleptic fit (n.): The frantic dance performed
    just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

    17. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito,
    that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning
    and cannot be cast out.

    18. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after you step
    on a bug