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How To Photograph A New Puppy...

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by lethal tupperwa, Feb 5, 2004.

  1. lethal tupperwa

    lethal tupperwa

    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2002
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    Location:
    Virginia
    ** Remove film from box and load camera

    ** Remove film box from puppy's mouth and throw in trash

    ** Remove puppy from trash and brush coffee grounds from muzzle

    ** Choose a suitable background for photo

    ** Mount camera on tripod and focus

    ** Find puppy and take dirty sock from mouth

    ** Place puppy in pre-focused spot and return to camera

    ** Forget about spot and crawl after puppy on knees

    ** Focus with one hand and fend off puppy with other hand

    ** Get tissue and clean nose print from lens

    ** Take flash cube from puppy's mouth and throw in trash

    ** Put cat outside and put peroxide on the scratch on puppy's nose

    ** Put magazines back on coffee table

    ** Try to get puppy's attention by squeaking toy over your head

    ** Replace your glasses and check camera for damage

    ** Jump up in time to grab puppy by scruff of neck and say, "No, outside! No, outside!"

    ** Call spouse to clean up mess

    ** Fix a drink

    ** Sit back in Lazy Boy with drink and resolve to teach puppy "sit" and "stay" the first thing in the morning