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:highfive:
How to deal with obsessive talkers?
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I despise being around people who love to hear themselves talk. I have several family members like that, and I am pretty much forced to be around them at family gatherings, during holidays and birthdays.
People who love to hear themselves talk are generally narcissists. They keep their mouth running, about...nothing. Excessive small talk. I call that verbal masturbation. I do not want to see or hear someone else masturbate. Before my FIL got dementia, he was like that. I like him much more now, because he doesn't talk much. Back in the day, I refused to get into a vehicle with him, unless I brought earplugs with me.
These days, my father's wife is like that. And my parent's daughter is like that. The former merely annoys me, but I despise the latter for many more reasons than just her verbal masturbation, as she is a meddlesome, passive/aggressive, parasitic, system-milking liberal, who was a complete failure as a single parent. Her 21 year old son does not have a driver's license, and lives in his grandmother's basement, catching rides to his job as a busboy that only pays for his video games. When she asks a question and gets an answer, she always either repeats the answer back, or says "Yeah" about 7 times. Her 7-stage laugh sounds like a laugh track from a sitcom. I cannot stand her, and refuse to call her my sister. I can't wait for this part of the year to be over, with my daughter's birthday, Thanksgiving and Christmas over with, so I won't have to listen to this crap for a while.
It's all I can do, when I am around these people, to not say, "Can you just not STFU for a few minutes"? I'm fine with meaningful conversation about real topics, but motormouths that talk about nothing drive me up the wall, and their voices are like fingernails on a chalkboard to me.
People who love to hear themselves talk are generally narcissists. They keep their mouth running, about...nothing. Excessive small talk. I call that verbal masturbation. I do not want to see or hear someone else masturbate. Before my FIL got dementia, he was like that. I like him much more now, because he doesn't talk much. Back in the day, I refused to get into a vehicle with him, unless I brought earplugs with me.
These days, my father's wife is like that. And my parent's daughter is like that. The former merely annoys me, but I despise the latter for many more reasons than just her verbal masturbation, as she is a meddlesome, passive/aggressive, parasitic, system-milking liberal, who was a complete failure as a single parent. Her 21 year old son does not have a driver's license, and lives in his grandmother's basement, catching rides to his job as a busboy that only pays for his video games. When she asks a question and gets an answer, she always either repeats the answer back, or says "Yeah" about 7 times. Her 7-stage laugh sounds like a laugh track from a sitcom. I cannot stand her, and refuse to call her my sister. I can't wait for this part of the year to be over, with my daughter's birthday, Thanksgiving and Christmas over with, so I won't have to listen to this crap for a while.
It's all I can do, when I am around these people, to not say, "Can you just not STFU for a few minutes"? I'm fine with meaningful conversation about real topics, but motormouths that talk about nothing drive me up the wall, and their voices are like fingernails on a chalkboard to me.
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LOL. I had a coworker like this; I'd made the mistake of bringing in one of my boxes to work one day and he got interested...then never stopped. He would insist on going to all the local computer shows, buying every possible computer magazine (remember when the Computer Shopper was 2" thick?!), make trips to the local computer store(s) at lunchtime, hit me with questions all throughout the day, then call me for answers at all ours of the night; we were still running MSDOS 2.x-3.x and WIN 1.x at the time... "But I can't get this 32BIT VESA control card to be recognized" followed by him reciting the contents of batch files letter by letter and symbol by symbol and word for word. I eventually had to cut him off with, "Look Jerry, how many times have I told you...I need to be in front of your machine looking at your hardware and the monitor to diagnose these types of issues (PnP my arse, especially with the User Manuals/Addendums written in Chinglish), and it's 10:00 at night, and you live freakin' 45 minutes away, and that ain't happening, so...bye! (clunk)"
And he was always talking about switching over to SCSI controllers/devices but never did, so whenever he mentioned the word SCSI I'd ask him if he'd heard about the new SCSI toaster or electric razor, and he'd give me this crooked smile and look me right in the face and say, "I hate you...I really hate you!!"
I loved it!
Eventually he learned enough to stop pestering me
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Give them a call. They'll appreciate it and you can easily say I just have 10 minutes, but I thought I'd check how you were doing.
Also stop the affirmative feedback of yup, uh huh. This can extend the conversation for some people.
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^^^ THIS ^^^
"Hey look, I've got a call coming in (emphasis given --->) that I have to take...I'll talk with you later, bye."
Or, nothing works like the truth; express your disinterest in engaging in long phone calls with the caller, but in a kind or humorous way.
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I deal with this a lot at work. Often a simple phone call can stretch out to 45-60 minutes. If I can spare the time I consider it part of my public service as some folks are just lonely. I really noticed it getting bad during the lockdown in the spring.
I used to have this little old lady that would call up to make complaints about things and she would just talk forever. She was a widow and lived alone. Fortunately I have a wide range of interests from hunting-motorcycles-gardening-canning-cooking etc so I can talk to just about anyone for a while. Rural folk anyway. I don't know much about city life or pop culture or any of that bull.
I used to have this little old lady that would call up to make complaints about things and she would just talk forever. She was a widow and lived alone. Fortunately I have a wide range of interests from hunting-motorcycles-gardening-canning-cooking etc so I can talk to just about anyone for a while. Rural folk anyway. I don't know much about city life or pop culture or any of that bull.
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When I encounter a nuisance jabber jaws, I ask them what they just said, after I first let them have a good bout of diarrhea of the mouth. When they ask what I missed, I say, "Everything. Start from the beginning."
Repeat as required.
Repeat as required.
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I try to stay away from folks like that.
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She hawt?
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Sounds like my neighbor! She will do what she can to help in nearly any situation. If you don't answer your phone she will drive over to the house to check up on you.
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Probably to you .
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My father in law is like that. He met a girl online from Australia so he lives over there now. Haven't seen him in several years. But he video chats on Facebook.
Last night he talked about meeting a homeless guy who theorized that those little pieces of plastic that hold a bread bag shut could one day be used as currency.
I dont mind talking to him because he always has something entertaining to talk about.
When he was here though, he was one of those people that could stop a stranger in walmart and talk for an infinite amount of time.
I kindve envy that ability. If I dont know you or even if I do...conversation is likely to be short.
Last night he talked about meeting a homeless guy who theorized that those little pieces of plastic that hold a bread bag shut could one day be used as currency.
I dont mind talking to him because he always has something entertaining to talk about.
When he was here though, he was one of those people that could stop a stranger in walmart and talk for an infinite amount of time.
I kindve envy that ability. If I dont know you or even if I do...conversation is likely to be short.
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I know the feeling, But it think listening to these people is important as they may be going through something personal and all the rambling could be due to the fact that they want to share their burden with someone.
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