Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Eagles1181, Nov 26, 2004.

  1. Eagles1181

    Eagles1181 Flying High

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    May 25, 2000
    The Great State of Texas
    Forgive me if this one has been posted.

    One day a 60 year old woman went up a mountain that any
    novice skier should have avoided. No one would have blamed
    her if she stayed behind. At 12 below zero, even Frosty the
    Snowman would have opted for a warm fire. Hardly a day for
    snow skiing, but her husband insisted. So she went.

    While waiting in the lift line, she realized she was in
    need of a restroom, dire need of a restroom. Assured there
    was a restroom at the top of the lift, she and her bladder
    endured the bouncy ride, only to find there was no
    facility. She began to panic. Her husband had an idea:
    why not go out into the woods? Since she was wearing an
    all white outfit, she'd blend in with the snow. And what
    better powder room than a piney grove?

    What choice did she have? She skied past the tree line and
    arranged her ski suit at half-mast. Fortunately, no one
    could see her. Unfortunately, her husband hadn't told her
    to remove her skis. Before you could say, "shine on
    harvest moon," she was streaking backwards across the
    slope, revealing more of herself that she ever intended.
    (After all, hindsight is 20/20.) With arms flailing and
    skis sailing, she sped under the very lift she'd just
    ridden and collided with a pylon.

    As she scrambled to cover the essentials, she discovered
    her arm was broken. Fortunately her husband raced to her
    rescue. He summoned the ski patrol, who transported her to
    the hospital.

    While being treated in the emergency room, a man with a
    broken leg was carried in and placed next to her. By now
    she'd regained her composure enough to make small talk.
    "So, how'd you break your leg?" she asked.

    "It was the darndest thing you ever saw," he explained. "I
    was riding up the ski lift and suddenly there was this crazy
    woman skiing backwards, at top speed, with her ski suit down
    around her knees. I couldn't believe my eyes, so I leaned
    over to get a better look. I guess I didn't realize how
    far I'd moved. I fell out of the lift."

    The he turned to her and asked, "So, how'd you break your