He asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by lethal tupperwa, Dec 6, 2003.

  1. lethal tupperwa

    lethal tupperwa

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    Aug 20, 2002
    I was walking down the street in Sterling, when I was approached by a
    particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple
    of dollars for dinner.

    I took out my wallet, extracted two dollars and asked, "If I gave you this
    money, will you buy liquor with it instead?"

    No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.

    Will you use it to gamble instead of buying food?" I asked.

    No, I don't gamble" the homeless man said. "I need everything I can get just
    to stay alive."

    Will you spend the money on greens fees at a golf course instead of food?" I

    Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20

    Well," I said, "I'm not going to give you the two dollars. Instead, I'm
    going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

    The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for
    doing that? I know I'm dirty, and I probably smell pretty bad."

    I replied, "Hey, man, that's okay! I just want her to see what a man looks
    like who's given up liquor, gambling, and golf."