Harold is 95 and lives in a senior citizen home. Every night after > dinner, Harold goes to a secluded garden behind the center to sit and > ponder his accomplishments and long life. > > One evening, Mildred, age 87, wanders into the garden. They begin to > chat, and before they know it several hours have passed. > > After a short lull in their conversation Harold turns to Mildred and > asks, "Do you know what I miss most of all?" > > She asks, "What?" > > "SEX!" he replies. > > Mildred exclaims, "Why you old fart, you couldn't get it up if I held a > gun to your head!" > > "I know," Harold says, "but it would be nice if a woman could just hold > it for a while." > > "Well, I can oblige," says Mildred, who unzips his trousers, removes his > manhood and proceeds to hold it. > > Afterward, they agree to meet secretly each night in the garden where > they would sit and talk and Mildred would hold Harold's manhood. Then, > one night, Harold didn't show up at their usual meeting place. Alarmed, > Mildred decided to find Harold and make sure he was O.K. > > She walked around the senior citizen home where she found him sitting by > the pool with another female resident, Ethel, who was holding Harold's > manhood. Furious, Mildred yelled, "You two-timing creep! What does Ethel > have that I don't have?" > > Old Harold smiled happily and replied, "Parkinson's."