A seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and the talk turns to their adventures. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch. "How did you end up with the peg leg?" he asks. The pirate replies, "I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. As my men were pulling me out, a shark bit my leg off." "Wow!" says the seaman. "What about your hook?" "Well," answers the pirate, "we were boarding a ship when one of the enemy hacked off my hand." "Incredible!" says the seaman. "Howd you get the eye patch?" "A sea gull **** in my eye," the pirate replies. "You lost your eye to a sea gull dropping?" the seaman asks. "Well," says the pirate, "it was my first day with the hook."