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Going to be a Daddy, again :-)

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by 1985 4Runner, Feb 3, 2010.

  1. 1985 4Runner

    1985 4Runner Agitator

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    Just found out. We've been trying for about a year now.

    On a related note our closest friends were trying too & found out a few weeks ago they were going to have a baby. Well he calls me today & says his wife miscarried.

    I called home & told my wife so she could call our friends wife & talk.

    Seeing as how we've been trying, my wife goes & takes a pregnancy test & is pregnant.

    So now our best frinds have lost their first child to a miscarriage & we find our we're having our second.

    So I'm happy & sad today.

    Have not decided on how/when to tell them & just going to keep quiet & wait for now.

    For those of you so inclined, please keep our friends in your prayers & us too.

    Thanks.
     
  2. Tow/Repo

    Tow/Repo CLM

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    Sorry for your friend. :sadangel:

    Congrats to you :thumbsup:
     

  3. skanless

    skanless IPA ISLAND

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    Good news and bad news all rolled into one. Cool for you and a really big Sucks for your friend.
     
  4. pack-indy

    pack-indy Emissary

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    This. :wavey:
     
  5. Joshhtn

    Joshhtn The eBay Guy Silver Member

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    Congrats!!

    Sucks for the friend... Been there myself.
     
  6. 23skidoo

    23skidoo Deceased

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    First, congratulations. Second, I'm sorry for your friend's loss.

    It will hurt, but I think it's best your friend find out from you that you're going to have another child.
     
  7. jeff painter

    jeff painter

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    It was really tough for my wife to be around friend when we were trying and failing and even worse, after miscarrying. Once we finally got pregnant things go much better. Don't be surprised if your friend's wife avoids you for awhile.
     
  8. Lothar

    Lothar Noob

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    Prayers sent.
     
  9. Spence

    Spence

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    Wow rough spot. Congrats to you though!
     
  10. 1985 4Runner

    1985 4Runner Agitator

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    We're all very close & our wives had been looking forward to carrying at the same time.


    They have decided to go out of town for a few days.


    I'm really torn. I'm on cloud nine for myself & my wife but at the same time feel like someone punched me in the gut too for our friends.

    I just see an awkward moment coming & am not looking forward to it.

    As close as we are I know they will be happy for us, just as we are grieving for their loss.
     
    Last edited: Feb 3, 2010
  11. MarcoPolo

    MarcoPolo

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    As a father of 3 and a guy who has gone through the other event as well, you have my prayers.

    I would give them some time and space to heal, but let them know you love them and are there for them. I would let the wives address this between them. I faced a similar situation and found that a sincere "I"m so sorry" and a hug says more than words ever can.
     
  12. Zonny

    Zonny

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    Wait awhile to tell them. At least a month.

    My feeling is that the whole home pregnancy test thing has done women a terrible injustice. When I had my kids, the DR didn't even want to see you unless you had missed 2 periods. Now, if it's 3 days late, women run to the store and pick up a test and announce to the world that they are pregnant. I waited until I was 3 months before announcing either one of mine.

    It's VERY common to lose a baby in those first few weeks. We just thought we were 'late', now it's a 'miscarriage'.

    I'm in no way assuming this is/was the case in your friend's pregnancy and hopefully not yours. But I always cringe when someone announces a pregnancy and their 'due date' is still 9 months away.
     
  13. 1985 4Runner

    1985 4Runner Agitator

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  14. Gallium

    Gallium CLM

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    Congrats sir. We stopped trying after our 1st, but that didn't stop them from popping out! :)

    Best of luck to you, and the lady + baby.


    'Drew
     
  15. Glock&KimberLady

    Glock&KimberLady Morior Invictus Silver Member

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    I had a miscarriage. It sucked.

    When you see her - and you will - do *not* say something like "Well, there was probably something wrong with it anyway" because even though it may be true, it's still a crappy thing to hear.

    Just tell her you're sorry and leave it at that.
     
  16. bluenoise

    bluenoise

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    Congratulations to you and your family! Your friend has my sympathies. We went through that, too.
     
  17. Glock&KimberLady

    Glock&KimberLady Morior Invictus Silver Member

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    Gah, and in my hurry to tell you what to do, I forgot my congratulations. :supergrin:
     
  18. JBaird22

    JBaird22

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    I agree with GKL.

    Congrats on the kiddo.
     
  19. whoflungdo

    whoflungdo

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    Sage advice. When people don't know what to say, they usually say too much or the wrong thing. I know if I'm in a situation where I have lost, I've found it more comforting for my close friends and relatives to be there and just listen or to say something along the lines of what you just said...

    To the OP congratulations!!!! Ain't nothing better than having your child crawl up on your lap, hug and kiss you, and say Daddy, I wove (SIC) you... without wanting something...
     
  20. Nestor

    Nestor Lean & Mean

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    Congratulations :)