Funniest thing your kid ever said when they were little...

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by BIGJC, Jul 29, 2020.

  1. BIGJC

    BIGJC

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    About 25 years ago, my wife and I were taking our 5 yr old son and 2 of his friends to a birthday party. As we're driving along, one of the friends (a boy) proudly announces "I take karate". The other friend (a girl) shouts out "I take ballet". My son, not wanting to be outdone, says "I take vitamin C". I wasn't sure what I had there for a minute, but he turned out alright.
    Let's hear some of yours.
     
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  2. mj9mm

    mj9mm

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    Not sure... my mind turned to mush from listening to my 4 girls until the last one was married off....
     

  3. The Father

    The Father

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    At the oldest sons (he was 11) basketball game and it was before the game. Youngest son (8 years old) was watching the pre-game happenings. 8 year never uttered a foul word that we had ever heard. All of the sudden out of the blue we hear “WHAT THE F***!”

    The wife and and I turn in shock. Youngest points to the basketball court and exclaims “look a boy is cheerleader!”
     
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  4. RoyHinkley

    RoyHinkley Just some guy

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    While on a road trip we walked into a Waffle House where my 4yo son promptly pointed at a 300lb patron and said, "Hey dad, look at that fat guy!" Thankfully, the guy took it well. He came over and said, "it's okay, I am fat!"

    Sent from my SM-G973U using Tapatalk
     
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  5. Hoochrunners

    Hoochrunners

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    A text from Mrs. Hooch...

    Hooch Jr. just came downstairs and said “Mom it’s so weird! One second my weewee is soft and squishy and the next it’s so hard.”
     
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  6. seamaster

    seamaster

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    My wife’s friends have weird thing for give dildos for gifts and when my son was very young, maybe 2, he found it and brought it to my wife and asked “mommy why are daddy’s tools in your bag?”

    Dildos and scented candles, anyone need some?
     
  7. BigBluefish

    BigBluefish

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    Had my just 4 year old son in the restroom at local coffee shop. Door to restroom is in wall where everyone is lined up outside to order at counter. He does his business. I then am doing mine and suddenly he is staring at me and blurts out "Oh my gosh, it looks like an elephant's trunk!"

    Everyone in line heard that.
     
  8. Hoochrunners

    Hoochrunners

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    Buy anything you want son. Anything you want.
     
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  9. canis latrans

    canis latrans

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    I used to be a pretty impatient driver. One day; my wife, and (then) five year old daughter and I were going somewhere. We got behind a slow moving vehicle and my daughter pipes up from the backseat with "What's he doing up there...PLAYING with himself?"
     
  10. ReaPer105

    ReaPer105

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    LOL I'm also impatient. I was in line behind a guy who wouldn't move when the light turned green. I honked and muttered "WTF is he waiting on" to myself.
    My five year old grandson quietly, from the back seat "Grandpa, I'm back here".
     
  11. thewitt

    thewitt

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    At about 4 years old, my son told his daycare provider, "I woke up today and I was God."

    He talked for another 30 minutes about what he had already done as God and what he was going to do the rest of the day...
     
  12. pittpa

    pittpa What did I come in here for?

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    Who the heck designed that place. My cousin turned the living room closet into a powder room. Another used the closet next to the kitchen table. No thanks.


    Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk
     
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  13. MinervaDoe

    MinervaDoe

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    Two things:
    1) We got my son DVDs for a British cartoon called Kipper. I knew he had been indoctrinated when he wanted a potato chip and called it a 'crisp.' Later he wanted to try something I was doing and asked, "Can I have go?" Both times, we needed to think about what he meant (since it was sort of in a foreign language).
    2) Another time I was explaining how things were done "in the olden days." My son asked me, "How do we do it in the new-en days?"
     
  14. naughtymoose

    naughtymoose

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    Two teenage sons in the mall. Oldest says he going to restroom. Youngest waits and then goes in. He sees his brothers flip flops under the stall while he is doing his business. Then goes to the urinal right next to the stall. Whips over and pees on foot at the edge of the stall.

    Oldest in stall starting screaming-Hey, Hey...By this time the youngest cant take it anymore and bust out laughing. He runs out. Meanwhile the oldest jerks his pants back up and runs out right behind him hollering I am going to kick your ass.

    Still laughing years later.
     
  15. G19Tony

    G19Tony Sneet CLM

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    View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9-xc6_GhkZg
     
  16. mdlott

    mdlott

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    Got any butt plugs?
     
  17. Grabbrass

    Grabbrass

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    Walking through the Christmas section at Target, 2 year old daughter riding in the cart. Sees something she can't make sense of, says in a voice loud enough for many other shoppers to hear, "What the hell!?!?" (learned that one from her mother)

    Her older brother at about 8 years old watched the movie Pearl Harbor with us one night, and liked it so much he asked "Do you think they'll ever make Pearl Harbor 2?"
     
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  18. Qman2

    Qman2

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    Funny now, scary then. My oldest child was in preschool and I had two younger daughters. The three year old climbs on the couch to hug and kiss me goodnight. My son says, "dad's having sex on the couch with my sister.". First I laughed......then I thought what might happen if he tells the preschool teacher that his dad has sex with his sister. Thankfully he didn't
     
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  19. IAhunter

    IAhunter Venor ergo sum

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    Large variety store, heading toward the packed registers, my son probably five, hollers real loud across the store to my wife, “I gotta poop.” Nearly everyone in the store heard him. Guy in line looks at me and says “when ya gotta go, ya gotta go”.
     
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  20. 4runnerteq

    4runnerteq

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    When my oldest was like 3 or 4, he's 28 now, he and the wife and I were in the femminen product isle in Wal Mart. I think maybe it was masengil ? that had the girl with the long dark hair and complexion on it, he say "look mommy there's Pocahontis" . I just kept walkin on by