Personally, I tend to strongly agree. I even stoke my G-21's with 230 grain FMJ ammo during the winter months.
To answer the OP's questions: It doesn't really matter; and I don't really care; but, I've been using Magtech 95 grain FMJ in my 380 auto. At the moment, though, I'm using Fiocchi, 'Extrema XTP' cartridges with 90 grain JHP heads. I got a good price on a lot of this ammo; (in several different calibers) it's nice 'n hot and blossoms ....... OK. Not great, but, OK.
I occasionally carry (weddings and funerals) a German-made Walther PPK-S that I've owned for the past 35 years. In 4 or 5 hundred rounds it has, never once, jammed on me! Austin Behlert did an action job on it, and SS Armoloy-plated it for me. It's a nice little pistol and carries well underneath lightweight suits and Summer wear.
(I don't lose a lot of sleep worrying about what I've got in either my 32 or 380 autos. Wait until you're close; shoot straight; empty the clip; go for the head, and you'll be fine. Which, now that I think about it, is probably, 'Why' I always carry one of these guns with three full magazines - I consider them to be, basically, 3 shot pistols!)