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"Flip'em Off"

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by Glockdude1, Nov 8, 2002.

  1. Glockdude1

    Glockdude1 Federal Member CLM

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    "Flip'em Off"

    I was riding to work yesterday when I observed a female driver cut
    right in
    front of a pickup truck, causing him to have to drive onto the shoulder
    to
    avoid hitting her. This evidently angered the driver enough that he
    hung his
    arm out his window and "flipped" the woman off. "Man, that guy is
    stupid," I
    thought to myself. I ALWAYS smile nicely and wave in a sheepish manner

    whenever a female does anything to me in traffic, and here's why: I
    drive 48
    miles each way every day to work, that's 96 miles each day. Of these,
    16
    miles each way is bumper-to-bumper. Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on
    an 8
    lane highway.

    There's 7 cars every 40 feet for 32 miles. That works out to be 982
    cars
    every mile, or 31,424 cars. Even though the rest of the 32 miles is
    not
    bumper to bumper, I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars. That
    brings
    the number to something like 36,000 cars I pass every day.
    Statistically,
    half of these are driven by a female, that's 18,000. In any given group
    of
    females 1 in 28 has PMS. That's 642. According to Cosmopolitan, 70%
    describe
    their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding. That's 449. According
    to the
    National Institute of Health, 22% of all females have seriously
    considered
    suicide or homicide.

    That's 98. And 34% describe men as their biggest problem. That's 33.
    According to the National Rifle Association 7% of all females carry
    weapons
    and this number is increasing. That means that EVERY SINGLE DAY, I
    drive past
    at least one female that has a lousy love life, thinks men are her
    biggest
    problem, has seriously considered suicide or homicide, has PMS, and is
    armed.


    Flip one off?.................. I think not.

    ;N
     
  2. bmorge

    bmorge

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    You should get a hobby, your mind is starting to deteriorate.
     

  3. Glockdude1

    Glockdude1 Federal Member CLM

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    bmorge,

    Check out my profile. I have plenty to keep me busy!!!!!!

    ;N
     
  4. bmorge

    bmorge

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    I retract my previous post, you are insane.
     
  5. Glockdude1

    Glockdude1 Federal Member CLM

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    bmorge,

    Thank you...................

    ;N
     
  6. doubletap1

    doubletap1

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    PMS- "Pass My Shotgun";P