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Do your part to prevent another outbreak of Mad Cow Disease

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by okie, Jan 12, 2004.

  1. okie

    okie GT Mayor

    Messages:
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    Joined:
    Oct 28, 2001
    Location:
    Muskogee Ok.
    To help prevent another outbreak of Mad Cow Disease we ask you to
    monitor your cows for any of the following symptoms listed below.
    If your cow displays any of the following symptoms we suggest you
    try the chicken instead...

    1) Your cow insists on wearing a little steak sauce behind each
    ear as cologne.

    2) She refuses to let you milk her, saying "Not on the first date."

    3) Your cow takes up painting and cuts off one of its ears.

    4) Your cow gets a silicon implant for her udder.

    5) Your cow appears on Oprah, claiming to be a horse trapped in a
    cow's body.

    6) Your cow demands to be branded with the 'Golden Archs Logo'.

    7) Your cow insists that all Hindus are sacred.

    8) Your cow thought Bruce Seldon would beat Mike Tyson.

    9) Your cow insists evaporated milk comes from thirsty cows.

    10) Your cow quits the family dairy business and applies for a job
    at Burger King.

    11) She starts giving you Milk of Amnesia.

    12) Your cow joins the Hell's Angels because, hey, its already got
    a cool leather jacket.

    13) Your cow starts smoking its grass rather than eating it.

    14) Your cow spends half the day sitting in the Lotus Position
    chanting "MOO" backwards.

    15) Your cow insists that it can give you chocolate milk if you
    started feeding it Hershey bars.

    16) Your cow seems to actually enjoy being 'Hogtied'.

    17) Your cow asks you to brand it again but only if you'll wear
    something sexy this time.

    18) Your cow purposely blinds itself with a dart and yells
    out "Bullseye"!

    19) Your cow starts smoking the cowlick.

    20) Your cow becomes a Muslim and asks to be called "LaCream Abdul
    Milkbar".

    21) Your cow insists Milk Duds are the result of stupid cows.

    22) Your cow starts laughing hysterically until milk spurts out
    its nose.

    23) You find your cow hiding secret plans to burn down half of
    Chicago.

    24) Your cow keeps wanting to chew other cows cuds.

    25) Your cow believes it could really jump over the moon, like in
    the nursery rhyme, if it got a really good run at it.


    Moo Moo