close

Privacy guaranteed - Your email is not shared with anyone.

Dear Abby......

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by nipperwolf, May 20, 2003.

  1. nipperwolf

    nipperwolf

    Messages:
    3,281
    Likes Received:
    365
    Joined:
    Oct 3, 2002
    > >
    > >Dear Abby:
    > >I am a crack dealer in New Jersey who has recently been diagnosed as a
    > >carrier of the HIV virus. My parents live in a suburb of Philadelphia and
    > >one of my sisters, who lives in Bensenville, is married to a
    >transvestite.
    > >My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling
    > >marijuana and are currently dependent on my other two sisters, who are
    > >prostitutes in Jersey City.
    > >I have two brothers. One is currently serving a non-parole life sentence
    >in
    > >Attica for murder of a teenage boy in 1994. The other brother is
    >currently
    > >being held in the Wellington Remand Center on charges of sexual
    >misconduct
    > >with his three children.
    > >I have recently become engaged to marry a former Thai prostitute who
    >lives
    > >in the Bronx and is still a part time "working girl" in a brothel. Her
    >time
    > >there is limited as we hope to open our own brothel with her as the
    >working
    > >manager. I am hoping my two sisters would be interested in joining our
    > >team.
    > >Although I would prefer them not to prostitute themselves, it would get
    > >them
    > >off the street, and hopefully, their heroin habits.
    > >All things considered, my main problem is this. I love my fiancée and
    >look
    > >forward to bringing her into the family and I certainly want to be
    >totally
    > >honest with her. Should I tell her about my distant cousin who is French?
    > >
    > >
    > >Signed,
    > >Worried About My Reputation
    > >
    > >