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Dear Abby, redux..

Discussion in 'The Lighter Side' started by MooseJaw, Apr 24, 2003.

  1. MooseJaw

    MooseJaw NRA Lifer CLM

    Feb 12, 2002
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    Dear Abby:

    I am a crack dealer in New Jersey who has recently been diagnosed as a carrier of the HIV virus. My parents live in a suburb of Philadelphia and one of my sisters, who lives in Bensenville, is married to a transvestite.

    My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana and are currently dependent on my other two sisters, who are prostitutes in Jersey City.

    I have two brothers. One is currently serving a non-parole life sentence in Attica for murder of a teenage boy in 1994.

    The other brother is currently being held in the Wellington Remand Center on charges of sexual misconduct with his three children.

    I have recently become engaged to marry a former Hong Kong prostitute who lives in the Bronx and is still a part time “working girl” in a brothel. Her time there is limited as we hope to open our own brothel with her as the working manager. I am hoping my two sisters would be interested in joining our team. Although I would prefer them not to prostitute themselves, it would get them off the street, and hopefully, their heroin habits.

    All things considered, my main problem is this. I love my fiancée and look forward to bringing her into the family and I certainly want to be totally honest with her. Should I tell her about my distant cousin who is French?

  2. pizzaaguy


    May 8, 2002
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    Central Florida
    Finally! Someone who is getting their priorities in order! ;f

    I really miss the tri-state area!;g (not)