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Dating single mom with kids, very little discipline

Discussion in 'The Okie Corral' started by nikerret, Jan 23, 2012.

  1. nikerret

    nikerret Mr. Awesome

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    I haven't had a controversial thread in a while; hope this one stays civil.

    I have been dating a single mom with two kids, boy, four, girl, two, non-exclusively.

    The kids have been over a few times to watch movies. Usually, they will sit through the movie, then, we have a snack before they all go home. One time, we all wrestled afterward for a bit.

    However, they don't listen to their mother and she doesn't force the issue. Tonight, she told her son to put his boots on for over 30 minutes before he finally did it. He threw his boots in the air, he ran around, threw his boots in the air some more, ran and ran around until he felt like actually listening. She told him to put his coat on when she told him to boot up, but she just picked up the coat and put it on him when he finally put the boots on.

    I understand the kids want to run around and I let them, even though my new home theater equipment is often in dangerous range of their playing.
    Their mother does real them in when they get too crazy around the equipment, but it still takes several times before they act on her directions.

    I will tell them to move away, settle down, and they will listen, briefly, but I don't think I should have to reel her kids in.

    Tonight, the two kids decided they were going to use me as a punching bag. I grabbed them both and held them down. I don't care if they're little kids. They can't just come up and hit me if they feel like it. If we are wrestling, that's the time to play a little rougher, I'm still off work due to illness and am not supposed to be that active right now.

    I undertand the mother wanting to be the kids' friend and always have a good time, but they want for nothing and don't seem to have any recourse for not listening. It's not my place to parent her children, nor do I want to say or do anything related to that.

    Perhaps, time has faded my memory, but I don't remember my parents' directions being optional.

    I'm going to discuss this with her when we're alone, but this is new territory. Not sure how well this is going ot play out; I doubt it's pretty. The single mothers I've dated in the past didn't bring their kids over (of course, we didn't date as much, either).

    She does keep them within sight pretty good, knowing my house is not kid-safe (weapons, chemicals, plastic sacks....).

    Any thoughts?
     
  2. wrczx3

    wrczx3 Jerry

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    RUN fast and far!
     

  3. BEER

    BEER bad example

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    play stupid games, win stupid prizes.
     
  4. Christian944

    Christian944

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    Punch them in the face, I think thats what someone did with respect to a similar story here.
     
  5. semtexx

    semtexx

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    Find a woman that has no kids!
     
  6. Huaco Kid

    Huaco Kid

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  7. 427

    427

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    Who need/wants this kind of drama?
     
  8. brausso

    brausso

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    These are parenting issues. You can't fix her problems, don't even try.

    I'd leave it to just a booty-call and only show up at her place after the kids are asleep.
     
  9. JMS

    JMS 02

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    If the mom didn't have enough discipline to keep her legs shut what do you expect of the kids?
     
  10. G36's Rule

    G36's Rule Senior Member

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    There you go. Solid advice.
     
  11. CrookCounty

    CrookCounty Trolling Noob

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    So far so good on this staying civil huh :super grin:

    Here is my saying:

    MILF stands for Mom I would like to ****
    NOT Mom I would like to date!!!
     
  12. Folsom_Prison

    Folsom_Prison Brew Crew

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    I dated a chic with a kid once, the kid was great but I'll never make that mistake again.
     
    Last edited: Jan 23, 2012
  13. crf250x

    crf250x

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    Just be honest and open with her. Ask her opinion, tell her yours...if you two aren't thinking in complete opposite directions, it will probably build your relationship.

    Come on guys the man is asking for real advice..
     
  14. G36's Rule

    G36's Rule Senior Member

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    And he is getting it.
     
  15. NeverMore1701

    NeverMore1701 Fear no Evil Platinum Member

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    What you meant to post was: "I'm banging this chick with two unruly kids, glad they aren't my problem!", right?
     
  16. brausso

    brausso

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    :rofl::rofl:

    You obviously haven't been around long
     
  17. ronin.45

    ronin.45

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    You will only cause more drama by telling her you don't think she is parenting properly. You can't fix her screwups. Keep it casual or get gone.
     
  18. Just1More

    Just1More

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    She's a money grubber. The magic box ain't worth half. Run away....fast!
     
  19. jpa

    jpa CLM

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    I had a woman I worked with that was similar. Her son ran all over, he threw stuff around the house, yelled at her, threw trash on the floor, didn't listen to her when out in public, etc. We went out just "as friends" a couple times and she had indicated she was interested in a little bit more. Then as if on cue her son came tearing into the room while we were having this conversation and threw a plastic baseball at me, hitting me in the head. All she did was yell at him. That was the last straw, I couldn't deal with it anymore. I walked out saying "I'll call you." that was the end of that.

    A few questions to ask yourself if you see this thing going anywhere....

    1) Can you live with a couple unruly kids?
    2) Can you see yourself out in public with those kids not obeying their mom and people looking at you like you're an a-hole for not getting them under control?
    3) Is this relationship with the mom worth it?

    In my opinion it's not worth it to deal with the kids...if anything go to her house and only when the kids are either with their dad or when they're asleep.
     
  20. nikerret

    nikerret Mr. Awesome

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    Post win! Hilarious!!! :rofl:
     
    Last edited: Jan 24, 2012